Steve - As always I appreciate your feedback and it is always good to read about your experience, feelings and continued sharing on the forums.
Squirm...is sex physical expression of love? Is a kiss (on lips, forehead) physical expression of intimacy? Why do people have sex? Just to have fun? or to unite through bodies so that uniting at mental level becomes easier?
People disconnect sex and love and it is impossible to do so. Sue has admitted many times that how can she not feel for Paul. May be because STB is there, Sue has not completely shared herself with Paul. Imagine a scene without STB in picture, and wouldn't Sue have fallen for Paul by now? So, your argument that sex can be completely detached from love is imaginary. As of now what binds Sue to STB is his past and also excitement of what STB is sacrificing for her.
And I also think that you are wrong when you say that the intimacy improves when Sex is taken out of equation. That in my opinion is completely wrong. Sex, too, is a form of intimacy - it's not just individuals rutting in. And, that precisely is the reason that Sue has said that she feels like "Cheating" on Paul. If sex were only physical, she wouldn't have felt that way. After all you work in office for 10-12 hours and remain with your spouse for just 3-4 hours - doesn't mean that you are cheating on him / her.
I also do my best to refrain from being judgmental on the lifestyle choices of anyone as each individual and couple are distinctively different than anyone else. .
So I am not going to get into specifics of motivation and for you to be asking it would led me to believe that you are truly limited in your overall view point of sexuality and overall (sexually and non-sexually) intimacy. .
I would say that you are being a bit short sighted as none of us know what the extent of the overall three-way relationship has been outside of what has been shared by Steve through his assorted multiple post on this forum. .
You seem to believe that only sexual intimacy can be hand through bare penetrative intercourse and that is where you are truly closed minded and very short sighted..
Yeah, Squirm, you are not being judgemental at all.....LOL!
Rak,
You really should learn to read, those statements are non-judgmental of the lifestyle. You are like the guy that takes one or two words from the bible, from the Quran or from the Constitution and tries to make it mean something different then what the full statement said. The follow up three statements you mentions are the same as the statements were you indicating that my view point was wrong, not a statement in judgment of a lifestyle that you may or may not led for yourself and or with your wife.
Than again, I do wonder what lifestyle you do live or if you simply come here to pass judgment on the lifestyle lived for others.
Is English your first or second language? By the way, do you also know what sarcasm means? .
Steve.
There are so many people that would be disappointed in you curtailing your posts. You have entertained, enlightened and educated many of us with the years of posts. Many of us sit silent yet look forward to following your and Sue's journey.
Some on here, and I won't name names, seem to think that by the small snapshots you provide of your life gives them enough formation to know your and Sue's life, feelings, and thought processes, and know you better than you know yourself. They act like a politician and spin small snippets to "prove" they are right about everything. You cannot help or stop others from showing their ignorance but if you stop posting they will say it's because they were right. I think there are many, like me, who just skip their postings. Responding to them gives them the attention and validation they they thrive on.
Please keep posting your and Sue's beautifully exciting journey and enjoy your life as you have been.