Husband Wanted To Be Cucked And Is Now Acting Weird. Wtf?!

[LostWifeToBLK]

This kind of thing changes a marriage some hubbies deal with it better than others. It happened to me a few times watching my wife well x-wife with her last lover. The sex was obviously better there was no denying it. Their connection was of the scale. It was a strange mental dynamic for me.

 

[sissy.natalie]

its really simple. when he gets horny again he'll do it. was rinse repeat

 

[zippless]

This is too complicated!

Seems to have gotten that way doesn't it? It shouldn't. I suggest you are both confused and hurt about how things played out.

Feels like not doing it again to see if we can make the lifestyle work will do damage to our marriage

Probably. But then again doing it without being on the same page emotionally assures disaster.

He keeps bringing it up! I'm like let it go!

Here's where I will respectfully disagree with you. This is an opportunity to find out how he felt about the cuckolding, why he left because this an adventure you were taking together, how it made you feel that he left and why does he want to do it again because it felt like it was put off by the event.

He's offered to "fuck me like he did" which means rimming and rough sex. I don't want my husband to copy another guy.

Of course not! Varity is the spice of life. Sounds like this is the point where your hub got jealous. Tell him you love the way he makes love to you and you prefer it over just plain fucking like wild animals. One is mechanical the other is love.

Plus, the other guy keeps texting wanting to meet up but my husband is stringing him along saying we're busy. I said you need to let him know because I'm not going to do it. Husband says he wants to try again so he isn't ending it with him. This is too complicated!

This is what is called Ambivalence. He doesn't want to feel like he did last time but your husband wants to see you sexually satisfied. Your hub needs to be honest and tell the guy you will be in touch if and when it is going to happen again. He is a lucky bastard and believe me he will wait even if it is a wait forever.

 

[Nazareth]

If I may offer any other advice, I'd say to relax.
There shouldn't be any expectations for you to "act" a certain way. Just be you, and let your natural personality shine.
You 'read' as a smart, vivacious woman, and there's no reason to change that.

When you get to the bottom line, it's your decision to make. If you choose not too (at least for the immediate future), make your point(s) firmly, yet politely, and stick to your guns. Your husband finds this a source of immense sexual excitement, but there's more to the experience than that alone. You two have to live with each other on a daily basis, and this needs to be something you can both find pleasure and peace with, instead of it just adding stress to your lives.

Your hubby needs to learn some self-control. Any possibility you can assert yourself and dominate him? I'm not sure you may be the best one to help him with that, but I don't know what else I'd suggest.

 

[milfchaser]

Communication = #1. My 2 cents.

 

[okdeacon]

SexiMexi. This is going to be the way it is going to be with you and your husband. Face it you want to do it again and you have told him that. He wants you do get laid again and he is not being completely honest with you about it. I bet you that his is beating his cock almost daily thinking about your new friend fucking you. You just need to remind him that you got screwed for HIM after he keep asking you to let him watch another man fuck you. Also you did not reply about it, and that is ok, but you ARE going to do it again. So if you like this man don't let him get lost, make an agreement with your hubby to give it another try and suggest that he watch from another room. This way it will not be as intimate for him and it should help his insecurity a lot. However it happens YOU want it, Husband wants it and your stud damn sure wants it BAD. I still say you will NOT stop. WHY SHOULD YOU? Good Luck okdeacon

 

[SexiMexi]

This kind of thing changes a marriage some hubbies deal with it better than others. It happened to me a few times watching my wife well x-wife with her last lover. The sex was obviously better there was no denying it. Their connection was of the scale. It was a strange mental dynamic for me.

Is it why you divorced?

 

[SexiMexi]

So many good points being made here thank you all again! So we are going to do it again. Husband and me had a long talk about expectations. His points were to not hold back. I told him it hurt his feelings last time! He said he knows what to expect now. I pushed him a little as a test and said the other guy is really good so I'm going to be loud and get off. Husband said "good, that's the point." We'll see. He said he eventually got the reassurance he needed from me so he feels better about the other guy pleasuring me. I tried not roll my eyes at that. Talk is cheap.

My expectations are to fuck this guy without husband leaving and crying! I told him he needs to keep his hand off his dick until we're done so he stays horny. He said he'll feeel awkward just sitting there with a hard dick and staring but he agreed. I told him if something bothers him he absolutely needs to speak up. I told him if the same thing happens we're done and he's never allowed to bring it up again.

I asked him if he'd feel better if we went into the other room while he stayed out. He said no he wants to watch. That eventually we can work up to that. I don't have a problem taking charge of the situation. I tend to have a more dominant personality anyway. This was just my husband's big fantasy so I let him run with it. Obviously that didn't work out so I think I will need to run things more this time.

 

[far2easy]

chastity works for us to prevent me jerking off

 

[Custer Laststand]

Hi Ms. SexiMexi,

Thank you for your positive update!

So many good points being made here; thank you all again!

You're welcome, Ma'am....

So, we are going to do it again. [My] husband and I had a long talk about expectations.

Excellent! As others have pointed out, authentic communication with your husband is the key — not just toward increasing your sexual (and psychological) satisfaction by taking lovers, with his full acceptance and acquiescence — but also toward increasing the quality and satisfaction of your marriage in a broad sense.

His points were to not hold back. I told him it hurt his feelings last time! He said he knows what to expect now. I pushed him a little as a test and said the other guy is really good so I'm going to be loud and get off. Husband said "good, that's the point." We'll see. He said he eventually got the reassurance he needed from me, so he feels better about the other guy pleasuring me.

All good. It sounds like you've moved your cuckold-to-be (in a full sense) forward....

I tried not roll my eyes at that. Talk is cheap.

Ain't that the truth....

My expectations are to fuck this guy without [my] husband leaving and crying! I told him he needs to keep his hand off his dick until we're done so he stays horny.

That's totally reasonable. Expecting acceptance from your cuckold-to-be of you fucking your lover(s) in front of him, while not getting himself off — thereby destroying his horniness — by playing with his weenie, is important.

He said he'll feeel awkward just sitting there with a hard dick and staring, but he agreed. I told him if something bothers him, he absolutely needs to speak up. I told him if the same thing happens [again] we're done, and he's never allowed to bring it up again.

Good. You laid down the law, Ms. SexiMexi, and extracted your husband's agreement. That's admirable.

I asked [my husband] if he'd feel better if we went into the other room while he stayed out. He said no, he wants to watch — that eventually we can work up to that.

That sounds reasonable....

I don't have a problem taking charge of the situation. I tend to have a more dominant personality anyway. This was just my husband's big fantasy so I let him run with it. Obviously that didn't work out, so I think I will need to run things more this time.

That's VERY positive. You've already taken a huge step, toward being acknowledged by your husband as the dominant partner in your marriage, by fucking another man in front of him— then bringing him around to your way of thinking with respect to continuing to do so. It sounds like you're beginning to take "Lady Misato's" program seriously (as described on the "Real Women Don't Do Housework" site I suggested, above). I encourage you to continue along those lines, for multiple reasons that (I hope) are becoming obvious to you. One is, you will need your husband's active support with doing house work, including preparing dinners and cleaning up the kitchen, etc., so you will have sufficient time and energy to date, seduce, and fuck other men you find attractive.

You are still in the beginning stages of effectively establishing a "hotwife / cuckold husband" form of marriage, but it sounds like you are moving forward in a positive way. I wish you the best, Ms. SexiMexi.

—Custer

 

[SexiMexi]

Update: we had the guy over Monday night for the game. They're both into football so it seemed liked a comfortable environment for my husband. Throughout the day, I tested him by saying things like I can't wait for him to get here, I hope he fucks me hard, I'm excited for my husband to watch again......stuff like that. I wanted to see how he reacted and he seemed fine. After he passed my little tests, I looked him in eyes (as suggested by several here on the site) and reassured him it was strictly sexual and that the sex wouldn't be nearly as amazing if he weren't there watching. My husband did tear up at that. Apparently he's a big crier which is fine.

Anyway, things went better this time. Not perfect but better. We started fucking and I got into it. Next thing I know I hear my husband cumming from his seat on the other couch! I barked at him to stop but it was too late. He went into the bathroom to clean up. After a few minutes I checked on him and was just staring at himself in the mirror. He said he was fine. I kissed him and he wanted me to keep going he said. His demeanor was certainly less than at that point so I had him do things like hold my legs up, spread my ass while Other Guy was fucking me from behind, they type of thing. He reached for his dick again but I put a stop to that quick. I got off hard a twice. Other Guy came so I went over and jacked off hubby.

Husband seemed to really like and respect me taking over so I'll have to do more and more of that. He was moody yesterday and very affectionate but nothing like the first time so at least there's progress. I know he's hurting more than he's letting on but swears he loved it. Anyway, there it is.

 

[LostWifeToBLK]

Is it why you divorced?

No not directly. My wife at the time fell in love with her lover. I had no issue with there connection I mean it did worry me and I knew I was in trouble the first time I watched them together but there was no way I would have stopped. I was so into the lifestyle and still am. I will say this sex can be a very powerful thing.

 

[zippless]

Update: we had the guy over Monday night for the game. They're both into football so it seemed liked a comfortable environment for my husband. Throughout the day, I tested him by saying things like I can't wait for him to get here, I hope he fucks me hard, I'm excited for my husband to watch again......stuff like that. I wanted to see how he reacted and he seemed fine. After he passed my little tests, I looked him in eyes (as suggested by several here on the site) and reassured him it was strictly sexual and that the sex wouldn't be nearly as amazing if he weren't there watching. My husband did tear up at that. Apparently he's a big crier which is fine.

Anyway, things went better this time. Not perfect but better. We started fucking and I got into it. Next thing I know I hear my husband cumming from his seat on the other couch! I barked at him to stop but it was too late. He went into the bathroom to clean up. After a few minutes I checked on him and was just staring at himself in the mirror. He said he was fine. I kissed him and he wanted me to keep going he said. His demeanor was certainly less than at that point so I had him do things like hold my legs up, spread my ass while Other Guy was fucking me from behind, they type of thing. He reached for his dick again but I put a stop to that quick. I got off hard a twice. Other Guy came so I went over and jacked off hubby.

Husband seemed to really like and respect me taking over so I'll have to do more and more of that. He was moody yesterday and very affectionate but nothing like the first time so at least there's progress. I know he's hurting more than he's letting on but swears he loved it. Anyway, there it is.

Good for you! Sounds like you guys are finding your way. I think he is such a drama Queen. I think he wants you to take total control. And you are right he does respect you for taking over. He is afraid he cant satisfy you like other men can but doesn't want to admit it. He is into the humiliation of it all. If he can't stop masturbating and cumming then he is totally into it. Have you considered a cock cage for him?
Have you considered finding someone new to fuck you while your wimp watched? Tell him that's exactly what you are going to do and see how he reacts.

 

[SexiMexi]

Good for you! Sounds like you guys are finding your way. I think he is such a drama Queen. I think he wants you to take total control. And you are right he does respect you for taking over. He is afraid he cant satisfy you like other men can but doesn't want to admit it. He is into the humiliation of it all. If he can't stop masturbating and cumming then he is totally into it. Have you considered a cock cage for him?
Have you considered finding someone new to fuck you while your wimp watched? Tell him that's exactly what you are going to do and see how he reacts.

Easy there with the wimp stuff. He isn't. He's emotional right now but a man showing those emotions doesn't make him a wimp. I get annoyed sometimes but he's mine so I'm allowed.

I have not consider a cage before. I'm very new to this.

 

[Enigma632]

If he can't control himself then a cock cage will stop him coming until you are ready, i.e. after the Other Guy has left.

Now he's probably not going to want to put it on, so I suggest that you tell him how good you will make his orgasm when you remove the cage and (for the first few times at least) make a special effort to give him a really good one when you unlock him as this will help get him over the "shock" of wearing the cage while you are being fucked.

Oh, and put it on him as part of the excitement of the build-up to the Other Guy coming over, just remember to make it a "fun" part.

 

[Knk069]

Great job SexiMexi. Thanks for sharing your adventures.

The cage will definitely keep him from cumming. It will frustrate him but his eventual release will be worth the wait.

One word of caution. He may be too embarrassed to be caged in front of another man. He may need to keep some clothes on during your time with your stud. Good luck with your new lifestyle.

 

[SexiMexi]

So it sounds think he's into humiliation? Seems like most husbands are at least a little bit that watch their wives. I know what the little cage thing is but don't know much about them. Do they hurt?

 

[jayem]

Have any husbands out there struggled at first then gotten past it?

There are some things I struggle with more than others, and that's after watching several times, joining in a few, and hearing about many more occasions. If it's just hard fucking it's easiest to handle, I love watching her orgasm and having other men cum inside her. And, of course, cleaning up afterwards.

What's difficult is if the sex agree having is more sensuous, a lot of him going down on her, slow thrusting, them kissing a lot during the sex. Her saying "fuck me harder", no probs. Her saying how much she loves how he feels inside her, how much she wants him to cum for her ... more difficult.

For me, picking up on another point,it's definitely best that I don't cum until my wife and her lover have finished (however many times they do it), and then I get to have sex with her after her lover has gone

 

[okdeacon]

Update: we had the guy over Monday night for the game. They're both into football so it seemed liked a comfortable environment for my husband. Throughout the day, I tested him by saying things like I can't wait for him to get here, I hope he fucks me hard, I'm excited for my husband to watch again......stuff like that. I wanted to see how he reacted and he seemed fine. After he passed my little tests, I looked him in eyes (as suggested by several here on the site) and reassured him it was strictly sexual and that the sex wouldn't be nearly as amazing if he weren't there watching. My husband did tear up at that. Apparently he's a big crier which is fine.

Anyway, things went better this time. Not perfect but better. We started fucking and I got into it. Next thing I know I hear my husband cumming from his seat on the other couch! I barked at him to stop but it was too late. He went into the bathroom to clean up. After a few minutes I checked on him and was just staring at himself in the mirror. He said he was fine. I kissed him and he wanted me to keep going he said. His demeanor was certainly less than at that point so I had him do things like hold my legs up, spread my ass while Other Guy was fucking me from behind, they type of thing. He reached for his dick again but I put a stop to that quick. I got off hard a twice. Other Guy came so I went over and jacked off hubby.

Husband seemed to really like and respect me taking over so I'll have to do more and more of that. He was moody yesterday and very affectionate but nothing like the first time so at least there's progress. I know he's hurting more than he's letting on but swears he loved it. Anyway, there it is.

Way to go Sexi. HE DID LOVE IT! That's why he said he did. He could not even wait to bust his nuts. He has a SMALL case of what is called buyer's remorse. Like when you pay too much for a new car just because you want it. Later you are a LITTLE sorry you bought it. But not for long as you LOVE the beautiful new car and the buyer's remorse is soon gone. You are on your way and believe him when he says he loves it, because he does. Again I bet he is beating his dick often just thinking about you taking that big cock and getting your cookies off twice on it. He will be wanting it more and more in the future. Believe it. You are going to have two dicks to take care of on a regular basis. Hope you can handle it. Best Wishes. okdecon

 

[zippless]

Easy there with the wimp stuff. He isn't. He's emotional right now but a man showing those emotions doesn't make him a wimp. I get annoyed sometimes but he's mine so I'm allowed.

I have not consider a cage before. I'm very new to this.

Bad choice of words. I meant it from a positional point of view. I probably should used another word like sub. And I agree with you being emotional doesn't make you a wimp.