Shadow. No. We have talked quite openly about this now. She is very much into her original statement that for as long as I have beta desires/needs that I will be using condoms with her. When we talked, we both accepted that this could be how things just are between us moving forward...
AZ - yes, 1/26 - next weekend and 2/16. We both feel relaxed about it this time and honestly, I'm looking forward to it in a way as I think I will enjoy myself too - something she and I talked about.
Had a few minutes this afternoon while Sue is out that I thought I'd share/update here.Paul was here last night. We thought there would be a lot more snow but there wasn't. Sue had hoped for a bit of fun with Paul in front of the fireplace (well - wood stove) with the curtains opened a bit...
Hello, Merry Christmas and Happy New Year to everyone.I did say I would come back and post some updates at times and I will bring you all up to date for now.
It seems that moving away from posting here allowed me to get myself more together and further in-sync with Sue.
She recognized it too -...
I have been watching here since I stopped posting and have been pleased by the many responses.
As I shared with others in private-messages, at times I felt obligated, almost as if this was a diary of sorts, to post updates even when there was nothing new or more to share. Yes, our daily...
Peak - haven't read your last 2 missives. Sorry, tired of being psycho-analyzed and picked apart here at sharing my thoughts and having you all tell me that it's not good or whatever.As I've, finally, become very comfortable with myself and with things between Sue and I, I have found...
I'll take a few moments to answer your thoughts Peak.Yes, we are past the point where our relationship could go back to 'normal'. I accept that - in fact, as we've talked more and more openly about it, in many ways it feels good to accept that this is what we both want for right now. I...
So - I am chatting from time to time on other sites and I suppose I should comment here that there are many others like Peak and those here who are surprised at what we are doing and how I feel about it. And yet, as I explain how I feel, many say they can understand but are surprised that I've...
Magna - before I answer your question I did want to share that this past weekend Sue and I did share some more intimate time ourselves. She seemed perturbed that Paul had been, I guess, quick with her on Friday night and it surprised me that she'd come home late Friday night vs spending the...
Cleaner - I can answer your question. I'm just tired of defending how I'm/we're feeling about everything and all of that.I usually have a pair of loose pants or shorts on by the time comes when I will join them. Our usual pattern seems to be that they will go to our bedroom and if she...
Hi all,AZ - I believe what Curt is referring to is the former name of this website. When it was renamed all the content moved over so if you're looking way back, perhaps it's still here somewhere.I decided to take a bit of a break from posting here and also decided to stop trying to...
UKMids - I understand what you and others are saying - however for me, all I can say is that I feel a tremendous amount of relief right now. It's odd but somehow, for me, relinquishing her like this has given me something I think I've been wanting to feel for a long time. When you say how...
Cleaner - thanks. For me, without a lot of people to talk to about this, it helps me to share my thoughts here.Last night was no different than other Wednesdays but it led to some interesting conversation that's relevent here.She really started it out by asking me again how I was...
Putting Raks distraction aside. I did want to share, for whoever is still reading this, that relaxing about being beta is finally seeming to work for me. It's taken a long time and to be honest, a lot of soul-searching on my part to move ahead with this but I have to say that I am finding...
I'm not sure I'm following everything Raks - but I suppose you're right - right now, I'm not the one she thinks about or wants to have sex with. I do know there's a lot of danger in that - we both know it. Will I ever be the one she truly wants again sexually - I do not know but I do know...
I realized I mentioned stuff above that I wanted to share. I know this sounds crazy and I admit it feels surreal here at times but things have continued and if anything, we are becoming more comfortable and "used to" everything. We both said that we felt we'd come to a point, especially...
I'll try to answer....1. Sexually, right now I would expect her to want Paul. While she enjoys watching me, I know she enjoys actual sex with him more.
2. Depending on circumstances, she could be possibly hurt or even mad if I asked/insisted on her cancelling or changing plans she'd made...
In looking at the last few posts, I suppose this is very anti-climactic. But as I said, I can't change how I feel right now and as she and I talked/teased last night - at least for right now - I don't want to.While masturbating with her last night we talked. Actually I came out and...
Shadow - you have touched on something that I have been feeling too. I'm not sure how I feel about the need to share/update here now that I think we've "discovered the truth" so to say. I do still want to share my thoughts and feelings but I think with how we have perhaps reached our new...