Pnisnvnh - lol - no that didn't and isn't likely to happen, partly out of just not wanting Paul or Sue or I to feel more self-conscious right now.
Let me explain first. This past weekend turned out a little different than I had originally thought. After I wrote that last post I went and found Sue and I told her that I wanted to be in the room and that I wanted to watch her with Paul and I told her that I wanted to try to "see how it will be" to watch and be there and to know that I wouldn't be having sex with her until this next weekend. She looked at me and asked me about what we'd talked about, and how this was going to make me feel. I told her honestly, that I wanted to try to embrace it and that I knew it was going to make me horny and all of that. I knew that was some of what she had been saying to me and I added that I wanted to be more at ease with how their sex together has become which made her giggle and she agreed that maybe being there would be good for me if I was serious about it. She held my hand and she told me that she loved that I wanted to do this with her and again that I should just relax and enjoy it however I wanted to. We talked for a little bit longer as she was getting ready for him to arrive and she looked at me and told me that maybe I should be the one to "ask" Paul to be in the room with us.
He brought some take-out food and wine again as usual and he also carried another bag with him, one that Sue took from him and excused herself for a few minutes for. He and I were casual and cordial but it felt awkward still - we talked about the weather and the ending of summer and golf-season for him. We were talking when Sue came back in the room and I was speechless - apparently that other bag contained one of Paul's button-up shirts as I didn't recognize it on her when she came back in and when she leaned in to give him a more passionate kiss the back pulled up just high enough to confirm to me that she didn't have any panties on. Needless to say - dinner was a bit surreal as I found it hard to keep up with conversation given the occasional glances of her breasts when she leaned forward.
To my own surprise - after our awkwardness over dinner I steeled up the courage and told Sue that I wanted a few minutes with Paul. She looked at me and her eyes opened wide and she made a surprise look on her face (behind Paul) and she said that she'd leave us guys alone. Now I was wicked nervous but at the same time, as I'd posted earlier, I had been thinking more and more about what she's been saying - and honestly - with New Years now less than 8 weeks away - I had been asking myself some more serious questions. Ones that everyone here has probably been saying "what the heck is he doing". But really it came to one question that for me I had to answer and truly accept. Do I truly want to be and continue to be more beta with her - and for me, I know that means giving in to what she wants and encouraging her to enjoy what she wants with Paul to the fullest. I know that I said it in the past - when I first accepted these feelings - that I want her to look to him for sex when she wants or needs it and that if it means none with me, then that is what it means. I know that using condoms with her now has become intensely fulfilling for me and while I will absolutely miss the physical feeling of her body, at the same time, letting myself truly go with what I can't believe I"m saying but that I do want to experience - I want her to do this with Paul and I want/wanted to feel that it was more out there.
I was so nervous that I don't remember the first thing I said to start a conversation because of what I had decided I wanted to tell him - and so maybe the 2nd or 3rd sentence was literally - "I'm happy that you're going to be the only guy fucking her next year". And with that, the ice was broken. Our conversation went something like this - from what I can remember trying to get the order straight:
p - you okay with that?
s - yeah, kinda weird to talk about it but it's what she wants
p - yeah, she's told me all about it.
s - so you kinda know how I am about it then
p - yeah, she says you're into it...
and then he paused and added
p - but you know this is her deal with what she wants with you next year, that's not me
s - I know.... weird to say but I want to give her what she wants
p - yeah - it's cool - I mean you guys are cool together so... I mean.... if it's cool with you...
s - it's weird, I'm sure you can tell
p - but it so cool that you guys can talk about it
he laughed and then added
p - and if you're okay, then hey, I mean it's kind of different but I think its cool now
and he continued (to the best of my memory)
p - I did think it was kinda weird at first but .... well, I mean you and her...
p - and now that I kinda know you a bit more, I mean, it's different but hey, like I said, you two....
at that I laughed and said something like
s - yeah - still feels weird at times
and he interrupted
p - but... I mean... the way she talks about you...
s - what do you mean?
p - dude - you two are something different, like you're the same people sometimes
s - what do you mean?
p - stuff she tells me you guys do and talk about, it's cool, you guys have your own way about things.
and then he added
p - I'll say it.... so what if you guys don't fuck like normal people.....
It was just the way he said it that I got stuck on. He kept talking but that really made me think for a bit.
I honestly don't know what he said other than it sounded like he was complimenting us from what I heard him say last
p - .... it's cool if you guys want to do this shit...
so I just continued
s - so... I kind of want to get used to this more, you know.... you and her....
p - yeah - she's said you have been going through some stuff with her about all of this
we talked for a few more moments in general stuff like this
he said somethings about it being great that we are comfortable doing stuff like this.
I guess it was me that finally came out because I finally said to him
s - if you're okay with it, I'd like to join you with her later..... just to be there.... you know....
p - oh yeah sure man.... I mean it's okay.... thanks for telling me though....
s - are you okay if i"m there? I never asked you I think? I just assumed that Sue....
p - yeah - I mean (and he laughs out loud) it was pretty weird at first dude. I mean I've never had someone.... you know....
s - watch you?
p - yeah - I mean it was weird, like you said.....
s - but...?
p - oh I mean now, well... (he laughs again) well dude it is still weird you wanting to watch... I mean weird for me for how it feels....
s - sorry....
p - no man.... not like that.... I mean she's your wife..... (I was going to say something but he kept going).
p - it was just weird that you were watching me you know, in addition to your wife.
s - I guess - we've never really talked about it
he turned to look at me more closely
p - look man- your wife is.... well she's fucking amazing.... but she's your wife....
s - and you're happy to give her what she wants? (and I giggled a bit)
p - you serious? who wouldn't?
and I guess he saw the look on my face
p - I didn't mean it like that - I mean maybe I did - sorry dude...
s - it's okay
and then I said it
s - I like it... like I said, if she had to pick someone to do this with next year..... you're alright
now we talked kind of idly for a few more minutes. He said how he was "spoiled" by her and I laughed and told him I knew.
But a few minutes later the conversation came back to him saying
p - so you want to be with us tonight.... just watching?
s - yeah
p - it's cool... I like knowing before we get up there.... thanks...
s - yeah - thanks
I called for Sue to come back and when she came in she giggled and said "awww did my 2 boys make friends?" and she pretended to blow us each a kiss. The 3 of us talked and Sue came out and said "so, did Steve ask you about tonight?" (she later told me she'd heard some of our conversation so knew the answer ahead of time) and Paul said "yes, he'd like to join us" to which Sue replied "that's fine by me, how about you?" Paul replied "works for me...." to which Sue added "but give us a little alone time baby, okay...." and she kissed me.
And so - 10 minutes later I joined them in our bedroom for most all of their foreplay together. They both acknowledged me but other than positioning themselves so I could see or be closer, they seemed to act as if I weren't there. I let them be close at first - I stayed primarily off the bed and stayed somewhat low so that they wouldn't see me as much. Sue still had his shirt on when I got there but it was unbuttoned all the way. Paul was naked and she had obviously been sucking his cock at one point. He was lying on his side next to her in almost a 69 position but they were apart and instead of sucking him- she was holding his cock in her hands and licking at the tip. From where I was behind Pauls head - she was on her side with one leg outstretched and the other bent at the knee and he alternated between his fingers and leaning in for a lick of her pussy.
It had been so long since I'd been that close to them - I felt light-headed and a bit nauseous at first as they were pretty into each other by that point and he'd obviously had his fingers and his tongue inside her from how her pussy looked - swollen wet and a crimson red between her pussy pussy lips - something I knew meant he didn't get her to cum yet.