Strip clubs and bisexual women...
Biwifeman,
Re.:
biwifeman said:
.... [My wife] started stripping at the beginning of last summer after we had been married for about 6 months. I don't like that profession for my wife.
A high percentage of the women who dance in strip clubs are bisexual, and a lesser percentage are "pure" lesbians. A while back a woman I had become friends with at a local club told me 90% of the women there are bi. (By that she meant a high percentage, not really 90%.)
Later, I quoted that remark to another woman at the same club and asked her if she would agree. There was a long pause. I could see the gears turning in her head as she thought about whether to answer my question and, if so, what she should say. Finally she said: "Not 90% but probably about 'n' are bi," where "n" was a number equivalent to around 20 to 30%. I had the impression she was telling me the truth.
From an incident related to me by another dancer at the same club, I know the owner (a woman) is lesbian. I don't know whether she's actually bisexual.
Twenty to thirty percent of the dancers in a strip club being bi is obviously far and away greater than the percentage of bisexual women in the population at large, which is on the order of 3% (roughly, as I recall), according to Robin Baker in his book, "Sperm Wars: The Science of Sex" (1996).
Baker (1996) makes the interesting point that among the ~5% of men who are thought of by others and/or themselves as gay, about 80% (i.e., ~4% of the total male population) are actually bi. Similarly, among women thought of by others and/or by themselves as lesbian, most are actually bisexual.
Thus, strip clubs can be thought of, in a sense, as palaces of absurdity. The men go there to watch the women strip and dance and act sensuously toward them, and give them money for that which supports them and the club (since the men also pay cover charges, buy drinks, etc). (The women also support the club by paying "dance fees" and other ripoff fees.) But, the women dance, strip and act sensuously more for each other than for the men. Rather a lot of woman/woman sex goes on between dances (I gather) in the dressing room.
Anyway, with regards to your wife: given that she's bisexual, dancing in a strip club is a near-ideal way for her to meet a lot of sex partners (perhaps serially, depending on her preferences) among the other dancers who are bisexual.
biwifeman said:
I find [my wife] has made a lot of poor decisions in her life. I feel she could continue doing so. Any ideas?
From your wife's point of view, her decision to work in a strip club is logical for the reasons noted above. A risk, however, is that a fair amount of drug activity (esp. pot smoking, which might seem harmless but in many or most places is illegal), including buying and selling, goes on among the women who work in those clubs. It probably goes on among the male customers, as well. Thus, there's a possibility your wife could get hooked on something or run afoul of the "war on drugs" and get busted. I suggest the two of you have some conversations about this, and develop a strategy for her to avoid it.
Also, it's very easy for strippers to become alcoholics since men keep offering to buy them drinks. It's important to talk with your wife about this problem as well, and persuade her (somehow) she needs to become a teetotaler while working — if she isn't already — and ask only for bottled water or coffee or something else nonalcoholic when men offer to buy her drinks.
The above are not the only risks, of course, but these are some thoughts that came to mind.
—Custer