Okay - hopefully this time will work to collect my thoughts a bit.
It's hard to describe how I feel. There is a most definite feel of dread inside me on one hand. When I let my brain think about the reality of what we are doing, there are times when I think I'm going to be ill. But then there is the rest of it.
This week has been long - but fortunately as others pointed out, work has been insanely busy and that's made some of it easier. But honestly, as this weekend and next week approach, is it crazy to say that a big part of me wants her to go? Every time I even think of what she's doing - it makes me hard as a rock.
We've talked so much, I feel I can almost live inside her head - I almost feel what she is feeling in a way. Late last night was another point where it seemed easy for us to talk. Actually, it seemed it was easy for her to talk and she profusely thanked me for "allowing" all of this. She openly said that she hoped "having Franks' stuff in me all week will make next week that much better". She's encouraged me to masturbate enough that I don't feel the intense horniness that wouldn't be enjoyable and she knows that. She did ask me what I was thinking.
I'd never realized how it could feel to be able to be completely open with Sue. It's really an odd feeling to talk so comfortably and relaxed about her desire for her lover. But it's also a wonderful feeling too. I told her that it turned me on incredibly - even admitting to masturbating to the thoughts of it - that she's letting her body acclimate to just having his semen in her. I've seen her wet/stained panties in the bathroom in the morning and you simply cannot imagine the way that turns me on - to think of her having just his cum in her all week long. Panties are the closest I've seen of her pussy since last Sunday night. And if I think back to then - that she actually douched out all of my cum so that she could only have Frank's in her is something I find intensely arousing to think about - literally her preparing for what she wants.
I asked her "is it working?". She looked at me and saw that I wanted an honest answer and she said "I think so"...."I'm horny right now and I really want him". I must have had a look on my face because she added "of course I want you - but this is about next week for me". She held my hand and I told her that I wanted to have her right then - knowing her pussy was still full of Frank's cum. She smiled and kissed me and said "but you're okay about it all, right?". Of course my hard-on again gave away my true thoughts.
We talked about Sunday and she asked me clearly if I was going to be okay being there and not having sex with her. I thought about it for a moment and then asked her "would you give me a blow-job?" She smiled at me and said in this very happy voice "sure - that'd work" and then she held my hand and said "that'd be fun". I told her this way she didn't have to alter her plans or desires. She held my hand and said to me "letting me do that to you and you lettting it just be Frank in me will be nice" and then she said "I didn't think about it but I could suck you off more often if you'd like!" I asked her, perhaps stupidly, if ingesting my cum was okay. She smiled and said "I think so" and then she giggled and added "I could always spit it out and not swallow if I thought it mattered". She hugged me and said that she was happy that I'd be okay with her just having sex with Frank and not me on Sunday. I groaned back at her that I'd put up with it many times when she was seeing Don. She smiled back at me and said "it makes me feel really special that you are okay with it being me wanting it this time instead of Don".
I am sure a lot of you are seeing gloom and doom in all of this - and that's why I think it's also important to share her clearly obvious excitement at "just think of our 'reunion' next Saturday when I get home" and she patted her pussy through her panties and said "you'll get to feel me again" and then she said in this incredibly sexy voice "and I know already how much I'm going to be looking forward to that too". She said "after 2 weeks of just Frank, I know I'm going to want you!". She giggled and said "you'd better take it easy with your right hand at the end of the week" and she reached over and massaged the bulge in my pants and said "I'm definitely going to want 'him' (referring to my cock) to be ready for me!".
Raks - I'm going to reserve judgement of your thoughts until she gets back. I do see the signs that most others see here - her gradual reducing the frequency of us having sex and me cumming in her. I will say that it obviously turns me on - as it would any cuckold - but I also know in my heart that we both feel an active and fulfilling sex life between us is a necessity.
After the stuff we talked about on Wednesday as she encouraged my masturbation fun - I'm strangely calm and I guess, not worried about next week. Again, the focus I felt wasn't on "her and Frank" but more about her enjoyment and ability to really let go with him. She said that she wants to feel the same level of desire for him sexually as I am able to bring her to when we were away. She said that in her head, it's not so much that it's Frank - as it is that it is NOT me. I didn't understand it until she said that she used to go out/away with guys that she liked but didn't always love or really feel emotionally for - but that she was horny for sexually. And in her head, it's because she used to have sex a lot with them that she was so into the sex when she'd have gone away with them. She said that when Don had coaxed her into denying me - that she did feel it was much easier for her to get-into-it with him. I know I orgasmed when she told me how horny she herself feels "with Franks cum in me like this" and at the time, knowing she was sitting next to me like that really did set me off!
I hope tomorrow goes okay. I've felt this gap between Frank and I and it's only gotten wider since this whole trip came up. Perhaps tomorrow will make some of that a bit easier to deal with. I do still like that he's the guy she's chosen - I do still feel good about sharing her with him and not at all bad.
Time to get on with my Saturday....
It's hard to describe how I feel. There is a most definite feel of dread inside me on one hand. When I let my brain think about the reality of what we are doing, there are times when I think I'm going to be ill. But then there is the rest of it.
This week has been long - but fortunately as others pointed out, work has been insanely busy and that's made some of it easier. But honestly, as this weekend and next week approach, is it crazy to say that a big part of me wants her to go? Every time I even think of what she's doing - it makes me hard as a rock.
We've talked so much, I feel I can almost live inside her head - I almost feel what she is feeling in a way. Late last night was another point where it seemed easy for us to talk. Actually, it seemed it was easy for her to talk and she profusely thanked me for "allowing" all of this. She openly said that she hoped "having Franks' stuff in me all week will make next week that much better". She's encouraged me to masturbate enough that I don't feel the intense horniness that wouldn't be enjoyable and she knows that. She did ask me what I was thinking.
I'd never realized how it could feel to be able to be completely open with Sue. It's really an odd feeling to talk so comfortably and relaxed about her desire for her lover. But it's also a wonderful feeling too. I told her that it turned me on incredibly - even admitting to masturbating to the thoughts of it - that she's letting her body acclimate to just having his semen in her. I've seen her wet/stained panties in the bathroom in the morning and you simply cannot imagine the way that turns me on - to think of her having just his cum in her all week long. Panties are the closest I've seen of her pussy since last Sunday night. And if I think back to then - that she actually douched out all of my cum so that she could only have Frank's in her is something I find intensely arousing to think about - literally her preparing for what she wants.
I asked her "is it working?". She looked at me and saw that I wanted an honest answer and she said "I think so"...."I'm horny right now and I really want him". I must have had a look on my face because she added "of course I want you - but this is about next week for me". She held my hand and I told her that I wanted to have her right then - knowing her pussy was still full of Frank's cum. She smiled and kissed me and said "but you're okay about it all, right?". Of course my hard-on again gave away my true thoughts.
We talked about Sunday and she asked me clearly if I was going to be okay being there and not having sex with her. I thought about it for a moment and then asked her "would you give me a blow-job?" She smiled at me and said in this very happy voice "sure - that'd work" and then she held my hand and said "that'd be fun". I told her this way she didn't have to alter her plans or desires. She held my hand and said to me "letting me do that to you and you lettting it just be Frank in me will be nice" and then she said "I didn't think about it but I could suck you off more often if you'd like!" I asked her, perhaps stupidly, if ingesting my cum was okay. She smiled and said "I think so" and then she giggled and added "I could always spit it out and not swallow if I thought it mattered". She hugged me and said that she was happy that I'd be okay with her just having sex with Frank and not me on Sunday. I groaned back at her that I'd put up with it many times when she was seeing Don. She smiled back at me and said "it makes me feel really special that you are okay with it being me wanting it this time instead of Don".
I am sure a lot of you are seeing gloom and doom in all of this - and that's why I think it's also important to share her clearly obvious excitement at "just think of our 'reunion' next Saturday when I get home" and she patted her pussy through her panties and said "you'll get to feel me again" and then she said in this incredibly sexy voice "and I know already how much I'm going to be looking forward to that too". She said "after 2 weeks of just Frank, I know I'm going to want you!". She giggled and said "you'd better take it easy with your right hand at the end of the week" and she reached over and massaged the bulge in my pants and said "I'm definitely going to want 'him' (referring to my cock) to be ready for me!".
Raks - I'm going to reserve judgement of your thoughts until she gets back. I do see the signs that most others see here - her gradual reducing the frequency of us having sex and me cumming in her. I will say that it obviously turns me on - as it would any cuckold - but I also know in my heart that we both feel an active and fulfilling sex life between us is a necessity.
After the stuff we talked about on Wednesday as she encouraged my masturbation fun - I'm strangely calm and I guess, not worried about next week. Again, the focus I felt wasn't on "her and Frank" but more about her enjoyment and ability to really let go with him. She said that she wants to feel the same level of desire for him sexually as I am able to bring her to when we were away. She said that in her head, it's not so much that it's Frank - as it is that it is NOT me. I didn't understand it until she said that she used to go out/away with guys that she liked but didn't always love or really feel emotionally for - but that she was horny for sexually. And in her head, it's because she used to have sex a lot with them that she was so into the sex when she'd have gone away with them. She said that when Don had coaxed her into denying me - that she did feel it was much easier for her to get-into-it with him. I know I orgasmed when she told me how horny she herself feels "with Franks cum in me like this" and at the time, knowing she was sitting next to me like that really did set me off!
I hope tomorrow goes okay. I've felt this gap between Frank and I and it's only gotten wider since this whole trip came up. Perhaps tomorrow will make some of that a bit easier to deal with. I do still like that he's the guy she's chosen - I do still feel good about sharing her with him and not at all bad.
Time to get on with my Saturday....
