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it's a start, now what?

  • Thread startermusms14
  • Start date

musms14

New around here...
Beloved Member
Aug 31, 2008
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Ok, so a week ago my wife and i are in bed, she wants to watch some porn. She has always had a curiosity about gay porn but i don't own any and she hasn't seen any. Before the porn starts, one of those phone sex ads is on and it's with shemales. she said she is currious and wanted to see more. I bought a collection of dvd's off ebay a while back and one was a shemale dvd that i kinda forgot i even had. She mentioned it though so i got it out and we watched for about an hour. She said her curiosity is over, no need for any gay stuff anymore, she said it was disturbing and she has no interest any further. So, a few nights later she says that she has been having d reams about it and they are in her words disturbing. I asked her what and she wouldn't tell me but i got it out of her after some asking. She said that she dreamed that i set up a three way with her and another guy, specifically a black guy. She said that when she wouldn't go through with it, i started sucking him off and she left the room because i wanted to show her it was no big deal but she wasn't into it at all and was disturbed that i was sucking a guy off. So, i see this as an opportunity i may never get again so i took it.
I said that i am not interested in having sex with anyone but her so she need not worry, but if she wanted sex with someone else, i'd understand. She just said, "really?" I said yes and that wasn't a pass for me to sleep around, i have no interest in that, but if she wanted to explore or experience things she had my full support. I didn't need to know in advance, i just had to find out afterwards. She sat for a second and said, "no other guy would offer such a thing." I said that yes, but i didn't want to sleep around, but she could experiement. She then said that it would never happen, she needs to be in love to have sex and a fling just wouldn't be that. She also said no guy would want her because she has kids and is married. I told her that is exactly what a guy looks for, no chance of a commitment, just sex because she wouldn't leave her family. Well, she said that she would never do it though, wasn't interested. I told her that if she changed her mind i'd be ok.
A little background. We have been married for 12 years, both virgins when we met, never had sex with anyone else. So, not like she can compare or anything with me and someone else. We have experimented a little with chastity and denial, she used a strapon on me a few times, we have a collection of toys that we use once in a great while. All and all, things are very vanilla. I just don't know where to go from here because i really would like her to cuck me or at least try some other cock, but it doesn't look like she will. At least she thought about it, if only for a second, but i couldn't pass that opportunity up.
 
Hi Musms14.I have had similar feelings for years. Though everyone on here has a slightly different take on things. I see it that you still have the opportunity to explain more of your feelings. She introduced the subject of the Black guy via a dream she had. Wait a few days and say ...What you talked about the other day has set me off dreaming . Say youve had a few dreams,all where she was enjoying sex with a stranger and she came home and told you all about it. Tell her you woke with an erection and felt really horny. Howver,tell her the thing that excited you was the 'competition'...the need to win her back. Wait a few more days .In the night when she is asleep,stroke yourself to erection,then wake her up again.Say youve had the dream again ,then pester her for sex. After youve done that a few times ,she will accept it and maybe discuss it openly. After I while if you keep waking her up ,she will say to you " I suppose youve been thinking about me with another guy again ". Make a joke of it and say ." You had a hell of a time though! "
Good luck anyway. In my case I fantasise about my wife having a much younger lover who can give her great sex and give her a great time. I want her to experience good things.
 
Hi Musms,

I wish you good luck on your efforts to convince your wife to enter the cuckold lifestyle. I would say that I find her interest in watching shemale videos, the chastity and denial, and the strap-on play to be much more than "vanilla".

We belong to a small percentage of people who enjoy the idea of our wives enjoying other men sexually. The vast majority of people looking at and enjoying "porn" on their computers would think you are far from vanilla (or "normal" whatever that is). Of course a lot of men and many women enjoy "porn", but that in and of itself is not considered vanilla by most of the world. So again, good luck, but you are already lucky!
 
Musms,

You say your "OK with it", but you didn't say that being a cuck is something you really want. Do you really want it? If so, being honest about it with your wife is probably a good idea. She was open with you about the shemales.

Perhaps you haven't decided if this is something you really want. If the thought of another guy pounding his cock into your wife's pussy doesn't turn you on, don't go there. It gets too emotional if you're just curious!
 
My wife and I are in bed, she wants to watch some porn.
That shows she is no prude, most women do not like to watch porn with their husbands.
She said that she dreamed that I set up a three way with her and another guy.
That’s a classic way to bring up what a person wants. Give her a few weeks before you come back to this conversation. Most likely will she tell you in about a week that she can not forget that dream of hers. That’s when you could ask her if she has any idea who could be the other guy.
If she does not reiterate what she dreamt, you could still bring it up in two weeks and tell her that this dream of hers is still exiting you.
 
i want her to cuck me, been dreaming about it for 10 years although i never had a chance to bring it up to her until now. I like the dreaming idea and going that route, i probably will. I just found out today that she may have some more medical problems, seems like she always does, so i may wait a while before bringing this up. As for the other kinky stuff, we are very vanilla. The chastity and tease and denial stuff lasted about 4 days. The strapon stuff i think she has done about 4 times in the last 10 years. The porn, she doesn't care about watching porn, but the shemale porn was just because she was currious more than anything and i happened to have some that came in a big box of porn i ordered. She also said she doesn't want to see anymore shemale or gay porn again, she didn't like it. I don't know why the guy in her dream was black, just thought it was something i should mention because she says she isn't attracted to black guys but perhaps on some subconcious level she is and doesn't know it. Still, i go back to her saying that she won't just have sex with someone. She never had sex with anyone but me so it would be a huge step for her. Of course, now that the dialog is open, i can always get her started with some roleplay into this. If this happens, i'm sure it's probably years away, but i never thought the conversation would ever come up in the first place so what do i know. I do want her to cuck me though, we don't have sex often, most times i get a handjob once a week and that's about it. Just have to wait it out i guess.
 
I don't know why the guy in her dream was black?

There could be many reasons:
1. She knows a guy that she has a crush on and fantasizes what it would be like.
2. She could have noticed that the black guys in porno videos have a big cock and she wonders.
3. She could have been on this or any other cuckold site and read about black cocks.
4. Maybe she was just testing your reaction.
In any case, she has the seed in her head, all you have to do, make it grow. If she comes back to her dream, that would mean she would like to try another cock. And that would be the perfect time to ask her if there is any body she would like to get pleasured by.

 
She needs to see porno threesomes with a black guy with a really big cock to open her mind to there being more available than just vanilla marriage.

I like the idea of you being allowed to have dreams also - and telling her in detail what xlothes she was wearing in the dream and what she was asking the guy to do to her.
 
Keep on talking

musms14 said:
now that the dialog is open,

Keep that dialog open! Don't push too hard. I would certainly not push the black aspect AT THIS POINT. It may be too much.

Tell her you have dreams about her being with another man. Tell her you've thought about it, and it would be OK.

Be prepared for a reaction, and keep things from getting too deep. This is new to her, and would be a HUGH change for her.

Take it slow!

Just keep the dialog open. If you press too hard, the dialog will stop!
 
thank you everyone for your great advice. It may be some time before i can use it though. She found out some pretty serious medical stuff this week, will be a couple weeks before we know for sure what's going on, but i don't see cuckolding in my future any longer. Hell, i don't see a sex life at all in my future anymore. Just have to wait for the results i guess and if things don't go as expected i can bring it up again at a later time but for now this idea is on hold.
 
musms14 said:
I said that i am not interested in having sex with anyone but her so she need not worry, but if she wanted sex with someone else, i'd understand. She just said, "really?" I said yes and that wasn't a pass for me to sleep around, i have no interest in that, but if she wanted to explore or experience things she had my full support. I didn't need to know in advance, i just had to find out afterwards. She sat for a second and said, "no other guy would offer such a thing." I said that yes, but i didn't want to sleep around, but she could experiement. She then said that it would never happen, she needs to be in love to have sex and a fling just wouldn't be that. She also said no guy would want her because she has kids and is married. I told her that is exactly what a guy looks for, no chance of a commitment, just sex because she wouldn't leave her family. Well, she said that she would never do it though, wasn't interested. I told her that if she changed her mind i'd be ok.

You could be quoting directly from a conversation between me and my wife (now hotwife) from early 2007. Blog of our story here. It certainly is a start - nothing more powerful than letting her know she has her freedom. I suspect for you now it's just a matter of time. Don't push her, but keep reinforcing the message. Good luck!

Ben

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Our blog: Hotwifing *******
 
Agree with her that she needs to be in love with a guy before having sex with him - but she first needs to go out with a few guys on dates to FIND A GUY TO LOVE, and "he can become her other husband" when she is not busy having sex with you.

Tell her that if she has two husbands, she will get a really good sex life - and you will do the work at home and buy her more clothes to go out and have a great time WITH YOUR FULL PERMISSION.
 
I hope the news turns out to not be as serious as you have made it sound. Wish you and your wife the best.
 

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