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R
rislis00
Guest
#1
My wife and I talked about the interracial thing for like 5 years before we acted on it. Unfortunately though I have suffered a severe backlash from the whole ordeal. Has anyone else's wife gone in the opposite direction from what we all seem to enjoy. I think my wife for some reason thinks she is less desirable to me afterwards and I just dont know why. We met with the guy about four times and everything seemed to go good every time. Until all hell broke loose and my wife informed me she will never do it again.
From the information you provide on the issue, I'd say she DOES get it, and it is obvious that you have completely mis-read your wife over a period of about five years. She obviously agreed to do the IR sex thing as a result of YOUR encouragement. You say that she seems to feel less desireable to you after each session. Now that she's finally taken a stance and said NO to any further encounters, you're confused? And you think SHE doesn't understand...
What is it that you're asking here? How to make her continue to play to YOUR need that she engage in sex with BBC/others (choose your own word). My thoughts are that if you continue to push her in this matter, even after her personal experiences show her distaste for 3rd party sex, she'll find someone who meets HER needs, to whom SHE matters. You seem to be ignoring all the obvious signs that she wants to be in a marriage where intimacy/sex is confined to the two people in the marriage.
Believe it or not, a lot of people have successful marriages that way.
OBTW: Why do you characterize the sessions with the BBC as 'an ordeal?' I could see that she might see it as that, but this is YOUR thread.
My thought is that she might have realized she is becoming somewhat addictive to having sex with her black lovers and if she continued, it would only lead her into becoming black only, much like many of us have already experienced. And because of her concerns, she might be willing to suppress these black desires, not only to her save her love for you but also to save herself from falling deeper into becoming black exclusive. If this is the case,
I can only respect her for having much more will-power than I had.. I've been black exclusive now for more than four years and have finally realized that it's time to seperate and go one with a new life with my black lover and again, maybe she has the ability to know this is the same direction she was going and has made her choice to stay with you...
its time to back off on the inter-racial thing and give your wife what she wants and needs, which is you, you ignorant dumb ass!
it's time to love her and re-assure her and tell her you want her and only her and that you promise to keep third parties out of the marriage from now on.
K
KennyBMD
Guest
#5
Duh...
rislis00 said:
My wife and I talked about the interracial thing for like 5 years before we acted on it. Unfortunately though I have suffered a severe backlash from the whole ordeal. Has anyone else's wife gone in the opposite direction from what we all seem to enjoy. I think my wife for some reason thinks she is less desirable to me afterwards and I just dont know why. We met with the guy about four times and everything seemed to go good every time. Until all hell broke loose and my wife informed me she will never do it again.
Assuming both of you speak and UNDERSTAND the same language, here's a creative suggestion: Take your wife's words for precisely what they mean.
She is NOT afraid/worried about becoming 'black only' (unless she's worried YOU want her that way!) and she's already done this "ordeal' for your benefit 'about four times'. I'd tend to think after that many encounters she has a pretty good idea what she WANTS and PREFERS. So let it go. Maybe take the time to thank her for indulging you and underscore the fact you LOVE her by SHOWING it...a good way is to respect her wishes.
I agree with Randy. Ever stop to think that she is getting nothing out of it? Perhaps she feels cheapened by the whole experience because it goes against what she believes in. You can make her do it but you can't make her like it. She held up her end, she tried it. You have to come back to earth and realize that she did not like it. You need to back off because you are the one who does not understand. You are asking her to be the central character in YOUR fantasy. If you dont chill you will probably lose her. Perhaps thats your ultimate motive, ditch her and get a bbc loving slut.
Just remember a bird in the hand beats two in the bush, but a cock in the bush beats two in the hand... or something like that. LOL! Its time you accept your wives feelings as valid.
My wife has been aware of my "problem" as she puts it for over twenty years. I've never put any pressure on her and I don't suppose my wishes will ever come true, but in case they did, it would be good to know how your wife felt about the whole thing. Does she know about DC or is it a closed subject with her? It sounds as though you have saved you marriage by a whisker, you might be able to save others if you share your experiences.
My wife and I talked about the interracial thing for like 5 years before we acted on it. Unfortunately though I have suffered a severe backlash from the whole ordeal. Has anyone else's wife gone in the opposite direction from what we all seem to enjoy. I think my wife for some reason thinks she is less desirable to me afterwards and I just dont know why. We met with the guy about four times and everything seemed to go good every time. Until all hell broke loose and my wife informed me she will never do it again.
Go buy her some roses and thank her for what see has done. Maybe to you you thought things were going fine. Maybe she isn't thinking about being less desirable but is thinking she feels cheap or used. She has tried it for you and her and don't want to do it again,let it go don't push it and let it take its coarse. Later on down the road when things have quited down ask her about her feelings about the whole past ordeal. My 2 cents Muleman
its time to back off on the inter-racial thing and give your wife what she wants and needs, which is you, you ignorant dumb ass!
it's time to love her and re-assure her and tell her you want her and only her and that you promise to keep third parties out of the marriage from now on.
