Hey
Yeah, it has been a while.
Things are good, I just needed a little time to settle down a little.
We've passed the nine (and now ten) month mark. It is sort of like that moment in a marathon where you are around 17 miles. You know the finish line is coming, but you're still a long way away. It hurts and it kind of sucks, but it is also exhilarating and fun.
Amber's BDay weekend was amazing. We had her actual birthday, romantic fun dinner. Then had the dinner party the next night, she got a little tipsy, was great fun. I sent her to bed while I tidied up and then I snuck into bed and gently woke her up for wonderful tipsy sex
Saturday we drove up to her mom's house in LA and had a great night with her mom and her hub.
I flew home Columbus Day, and honestly there was a let down after the amazing weekend. I wished I could be home with her. We had some LONG conversations about us and my fears. I confessed that while I was totally turned on by her being Dr. M's girlfriend I was also scared of her being Dr. M's GIRLFRIEND.
There was a lot of talking, a lot of phone sex, a lot more talking lol
Basically, she assured me that, yes, Dr. M is enormously attractive to her BUT he has two flaws that she is happy to overlook since she is married, but would be deal breakers if they were "really" dating.
First he is strong silent type. She is way turned on by it, but she admits that after a while she'd hate not "knowing him" and she loves how she knows me. And the second part is he has an ex-wife and kids, and she knows that they would demand (and deserve) some of his time and she is "not willing to ever be second"
After that we kind of fell (well I did) into the "best friend" conversation. She admitted that they had been out near his house, walking in town. Ran into a guy he knew, older, distinguished. Amber LOVED that M paused and then just said "and this is my girlfriend, Amber"
I pretended to be shocked "but you're married!"
"I know, i reminded him after we walked away"
"and?"
"He pulled me to him and kissed me and told me that was one of the many things that turned him on about me"
“Did you tell your husband?”
“Yeah, I tell him everything. I hate him being away but I am so lucky he lets me be myself”
We sort of continued like that for about two weeks.
I think I do it because it gives me a little distance from the immediate intensity but we can still talk about some of the issues of her dating. She likes it to because she can say things to a “friend” rather than her husband.
A little over a week ago she had to head up to Orange County for a product demonstration. Basically it is a work dinner for her with a bunch of surgeons and then they go through the technique on one of her products. Dinner was at 5:30 in Orange County. Driving is usually a nightmare so she took the train. Turned out there was a “charming” guy on the train. Mid-30’s, had a “starter marriage” but was divorced now. Bought her a drink, flirt flirt.
They ended up meeting for “coffee” last Saturday (M had his kids, and she had been with him Friday night). She chose to meet around 4 and wore a simple dress and heels so that if things went well it could turn into drinks. Which it did. But unfortunately it didn’t go much further because he had dinner plans that he couldn’t get out of.
She explained her marriage by telling him we are separated, I live in Chicago but I visit often and we talk a lot. She definitely still loves me and we are working things out, but for now she is dating.
He didn’t press the meaning of “dating” but he did ask her out for dinner this past Monday night. They had a great time, unfortunately she got called during dinner and had to go to work. She ended up covering the case with a well respected surgeon in town (not M lol). Anyhow, as they were finishing it was clear he had noticed she was in scrubs and heels. He looked down at her feet and said “Were you at dinner?” she said yes and he said “Well, tell your husband I’m sorry for ruining your date”
She didn’t correct him, but LOVED it anyhow.
So after her early end to dinner they made plans to get together again Friday and so she spent last night with him. I was actually in the office working today and got a text from her that said “FUN! Tell you l8r” I tried to call her but she hasn’t picked up. I know she is helping a friend with logistics for a charity triathlon race this weekend, and is seeing M tonight. Can’t wait to get full details.
It is funny though how my wife cheating on M makes me feel more secure lol.