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  • Thread starterAmberboy
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I'm an exhibitionist. When it comes to watching usually it annoys me and triggers my bullying trauma where I was ****** to watch and told I can't have sex cos I'm too young, flat, a virgin (I'm not one but this was a while ago), etc. Which is supposed to be sexy on a female but it was older women in my family who did it so of course they wanted to out of jealousy. If I had one of my cuck and his wife's students I would try to play around with her with some of what I went through if she wanted it and thougut it was hot. Because it fascinated me that I got abused so much FOR being stupid and not knowing stuff. They wanted me specifically for not knowing stuff. I was diagnosed as a retard back then. Unknown disability, the official diagnosis
 
My response to it over arching and long term is just going lower in ages that I was looking for. They less they know the more control I have. And I just don't know to feel any kind of guilt or shame about that, from being rejected. It's definitely on men to be normal and respond normally to a woman being old enough to know what she wants and ask for it. And I know I'm actually more attracted to men my age and older men, much older men, but they don't want me back. So I just mimic their behavior in my selection choice. Because clearly they have the right idea. The lower you go the more obedient of a lover they are. I'd rather be submissive, but I settle on just training someone to be dominant who's a submissive little bitch and just does whatever someone says. That's my current lover. But the most annoying part is how he's so hot looking he almost never initiates touch first, it doesn't make me feel physically attractive because when a older guy does it they act like they need it because they have nothing else. In fantasy because that's still hard for me to find irl
 

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