Hi Ms. IndyShellie,
Here are some further thoughts re.:
IndyShellie28 said:
.... he [my 19 year-old black neighbor who is now my lover] asked me if he could share me with his friends.
This sounds like one of the classic ways women are recruited into ************ by male "lovers" who then become their pimps.
Consider the following. Once your 19 year-old black neighbor starts introducing you to his "friends," you will have no way of knowing whether they are men who are paying him (not you) to fuck you.
And, consider also that once you become involved in sex with multiple partners who are supposedly your neighbor's "friends," there may be increasing pressure to use drugs during these encounters to "increase your pleasure." You already know your neighbor had in mind introducing you to a heavier-duty, more concentrated form of pot to get you into bed — but, you circumvented that (I gather) by making it clear you wanted to fuck him without the aid of more concentrated pot. Obviously, your neighbor has access to drugs — and, with his friends, there could be increasing, perhaps irresistible social pressure to use whatever they're using. That, in turn, could lead to you becoming addicted to something considerably more hard-core than pot.
Once you're addicted to __________ (fill in the blank), your neighbor would, like as not, be your only source of __________. You would then be dependent on him for whatever you become addicted to, and would no longer have any choice — you would have to fuck whoever he introduces you to, one at a time or perhaps a number of them at a time, and some of them might not be very nice guys. And, you would never see a dime of whatever they're paying your neighbor as your pimp (a role he would probably never admit to).
At some point during this process, your husband would (most likely) become aware of what's going on and divorce you (probably). You would then be a ********** without a home, dependent on your neighbor to supply whatever satisfies your addiction and dependent on whatever nickels and dimes he's willing to give you, from the much larger amounts his "friends" are paying him as your pimp, so you'll have something to live on.
I know this doesn't sound like a very nice outcome for a married woman like yourself who just wants some sex above and beyond what your husband can provide. But, it's a potential outcome I suggest you consider.
A way to forestall this potential outcome would be to tell your 19 year-old neighbor that your affair with him will be only with him. When you and he decide to end your relationship — that will happen, presumably, sooner or later — then, you'd appreciate it if he would introduce you to a suitable friend; i.e., someone you like and find a sexual turn-on. But, for now and afterwards, it will be one lover at a time.
In other words, I suggest telling your young lover you prefer 'serial monogamy.' You could say that briefly, and would not have to become involved in trying to explain the above line of reasoning (which I'm sure he would deny having in mind).
—Custer
