This is long but would like some feedback mostly from a womens point of view, but guys are welcome as well. Please tell me if you are a female or male commenting. Thanks
I'm not sure how to progress here...but here goes. We have never done anything like this before but have discussed it a few times without completion. The result of our conversations has been her not wanting to discuss it. I would never push her into something she did not want to do, however I seriously think she is open to letting an intimate relationship outside our marriage happen naturally and I will explain how I arrived at this conclusion.
First of all she is not inhibited when she is enjoying the company of others. She flirts, she likes being to be flirted with, and when she is comfortable with whom she is with she responds in kind to innuendos that are sexual in nature. She has been very comfortable to a couple of our male friends and one in particular married ex-neighbor who loved to pull her close and kiss her at every opportunity (she never complained to him or to me). Dick (not their real names), and Lily (his wife) were our go out to dinner friends, have a drinks with each other etc. This continued until they surprised us one day with the announcement that they were divorcing and selling their home. Each took up residence on opposite sides of our city and Dick was the one that stayed in touch even coming to the house for dinner a couple of times. During this time he emailed regularly with lots of naughty jokes, and in conversing it has been mainly directed to my wife. Here is where it gets interesting….I decided to tell her (while Dick still lived in our city and now He’s in another state) of a conversation Dick and I had had when they still lived down the street. I told her that I had asked him point blank one night if he was interested in her, since he was fairly obvious in his flirtatious actions. He was taken aback at first by my question but when I assured him that I was not upset by it but rather I was flattered that he found her attractive, he confessed to me that he found her to be really cute and sweet and with a little further questioning he admitted that he would love to take her to bed. She asked me how I responded to Dick at that point and so I told her that I told him that if she was interested then it was totally up to them and that he would have to approach her not me, but that it wouldn't bother me. My wife was neither shocked nor appalled of Dick's desires or my willingness to be okay with it. He continues to email regularly and she with him in spite of all of this being out in the open (I made sure both know) even though he has moved back to the state where he is from and is now remarried they still email each other regularly.
The point here is I truly believe she is receptive to the right person/couple just not out loud (she just can’t admit it). It somehow isn’t proper to say it but ok to let it happen. So I don’t know how to get it to happen without trying to actually find that willing couple since I can’t say it out loud.
What’s your opinion….
I'm not sure how to progress here...but here goes. We have never done anything like this before but have discussed it a few times without completion. The result of our conversations has been her not wanting to discuss it. I would never push her into something she did not want to do, however I seriously think she is open to letting an intimate relationship outside our marriage happen naturally and I will explain how I arrived at this conclusion.
First of all she is not inhibited when she is enjoying the company of others. She flirts, she likes being to be flirted with, and when she is comfortable with whom she is with she responds in kind to innuendos that are sexual in nature. She has been very comfortable to a couple of our male friends and one in particular married ex-neighbor who loved to pull her close and kiss her at every opportunity (she never complained to him or to me). Dick (not their real names), and Lily (his wife) were our go out to dinner friends, have a drinks with each other etc. This continued until they surprised us one day with the announcement that they were divorcing and selling their home. Each took up residence on opposite sides of our city and Dick was the one that stayed in touch even coming to the house for dinner a couple of times. During this time he emailed regularly with lots of naughty jokes, and in conversing it has been mainly directed to my wife. Here is where it gets interesting….I decided to tell her (while Dick still lived in our city and now He’s in another state) of a conversation Dick and I had had when they still lived down the street. I told her that I had asked him point blank one night if he was interested in her, since he was fairly obvious in his flirtatious actions. He was taken aback at first by my question but when I assured him that I was not upset by it but rather I was flattered that he found her attractive, he confessed to me that he found her to be really cute and sweet and with a little further questioning he admitted that he would love to take her to bed. She asked me how I responded to Dick at that point and so I told her that I told him that if she was interested then it was totally up to them and that he would have to approach her not me, but that it wouldn't bother me. My wife was neither shocked nor appalled of Dick's desires or my willingness to be okay with it. He continues to email regularly and she with him in spite of all of this being out in the open (I made sure both know) even though he has moved back to the state where he is from and is now remarried they still email each other regularly.
The point here is I truly believe she is receptive to the right person/couple just not out loud (she just can’t admit it). It somehow isn’t proper to say it but ok to let it happen. So I don’t know how to get it to happen without trying to actually find that willing couple since I can’t say it out loud.
What’s your opinion….
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