Hello,
I am a 30 year old guy with a 20 lady in central Kentucky, we live in different cities though as we are both in college. She often gets hot when I discuss bringing another man into our sexual play, however she comes from a conservative family background which may sometimes causes problems as she gets very turned on by the idea, and usually enjoys it when I bring it up, though when we get around to actually discussing going further she seems to get a little on the defensive about it, and asks why do I want to change her. I have even suggested that I would give up on my desire if it bothers her, instead she actually encourages it and says that she doesn't want me to change at all. This is really confusing for me. I am a grad student in psychology, and am wondering if she enjoys that I have the desire to see her with someone else, but is possibly repressing her own feelings about it due to some internal conflict she is having, or maybe I am just over analyzing the situation. She has kissed another guy and another girl on a couple of occasions since we have been together, and really did enjoy it. These people are close friends of ours who were in a poly relationship at the time, and have since broken up. Thus, we lost the opportunity to intermingle with them. When she gets around a dominant flirtatious man with magnetism, she does seem to fall under his spell and really enjoys the attention he gives her. Another thing is that my lady is very sexual, but likes to be somewhat subversive about it, playing the innocent role. She will give me a handjob under the dinner table sitting across from her parents, at a picnic table out in public, or even a blowjob in a parking lot in the middle of the day. In fact she got so into it one time we were almost caught. These are things she acts like she would never do, but when given the opportunity she enjoys them and tries to repeat them. She was a virgin before we were together, and for over a year refused to give me a blowjob. Once she actually had a taste though, it instantly became her favorite sexual activity.
She has told me on numerous times that she doesn't mind if I discuss online with other people about them fucking her, but when they have actually tried to contact her online, as sometimes she gave me permission to give certain guys her personal contact information she tended to lock up and give them terse responses, and has since told me that part of the reason is that she feels like a piece of meat when people approach her in that manner, and that she doesn't know how to respond, as she is uncomfortable with someone contacting her out of the blue that she doesn't know much about. She has hinted that she would rather meet someone that I introduced to her as a friend of mine in person, and go from there. In person she tends to be very flirtatious, sometimes she doesn't even realize it. She has told me that she does have an underlying fear of men in general which may be part of the problem, but at the same time she has demonstrated traits that would be considered rather submissive in nature though she will not readily admit to being submissive. I am not sure how I should handle this situation, and any advice would be helpful.
Thanks.
I am a 30 year old guy with a 20 lady in central Kentucky, we live in different cities though as we are both in college. She often gets hot when I discuss bringing another man into our sexual play, however she comes from a conservative family background which may sometimes causes problems as she gets very turned on by the idea, and usually enjoys it when I bring it up, though when we get around to actually discussing going further she seems to get a little on the defensive about it, and asks why do I want to change her. I have even suggested that I would give up on my desire if it bothers her, instead she actually encourages it and says that she doesn't want me to change at all. This is really confusing for me. I am a grad student in psychology, and am wondering if she enjoys that I have the desire to see her with someone else, but is possibly repressing her own feelings about it due to some internal conflict she is having, or maybe I am just over analyzing the situation. She has kissed another guy and another girl on a couple of occasions since we have been together, and really did enjoy it. These people are close friends of ours who were in a poly relationship at the time, and have since broken up. Thus, we lost the opportunity to intermingle with them. When she gets around a dominant flirtatious man with magnetism, she does seem to fall under his spell and really enjoys the attention he gives her. Another thing is that my lady is very sexual, but likes to be somewhat subversive about it, playing the innocent role. She will give me a handjob under the dinner table sitting across from her parents, at a picnic table out in public, or even a blowjob in a parking lot in the middle of the day. In fact she got so into it one time we were almost caught. These are things she acts like she would never do, but when given the opportunity she enjoys them and tries to repeat them. She was a virgin before we were together, and for over a year refused to give me a blowjob. Once she actually had a taste though, it instantly became her favorite sexual activity.
She has told me on numerous times that she doesn't mind if I discuss online with other people about them fucking her, but when they have actually tried to contact her online, as sometimes she gave me permission to give certain guys her personal contact information she tended to lock up and give them terse responses, and has since told me that part of the reason is that she feels like a piece of meat when people approach her in that manner, and that she doesn't know how to respond, as she is uncomfortable with someone contacting her out of the blue that she doesn't know much about. She has hinted that she would rather meet someone that I introduced to her as a friend of mine in person, and go from there. In person she tends to be very flirtatious, sometimes she doesn't even realize it. She has told me that she does have an underlying fear of men in general which may be part of the problem, but at the same time she has demonstrated traits that would be considered rather submissive in nature though she will not readily admit to being submissive. I am not sure how I should handle this situation, and any advice would be helpful.
Thanks.