My confession

[curiousmale]

Hi, i'm not quite sure why i need to share this or what answers i'm looking for but i would be interested to hear the opinons and advice of others. I'd also like to add i'm not writing this as a fantasy just for the turn on...i would save that for erotic stories etc.

I have been with with my GF (attractive, size 10, 26yrs old) for just over a year and we are engaged, we live together and we are in deeply love. I was with my ex for a few years and never talked to her about my fantasies until the end of our relationship and it wasn't anything we shared really.

With the GF i'm with now we've discussed fantasies, i've wrote her erotic fantasies with her as the 'star' and where she is getting fucked by another man or other men - and she really liked it. Wanted me to write more.

I can't believe i admitted to her that the thought of her being fucked by another man is a massive turn on, or the idea of watching. I can't believe how much she is actually turned on by this and is able to talk with me about how it doesn't affect our love/relationship.

We roleplay where she is having an affair.

The one thing i'd not admitted to was being turned on by the thought of her with a mate i know, who she says she isn't attracted too and who she gets along with but doesn't like him as a person, he really irritates her and she dislikes his disrespect for women. He's also less clean cut than her usual type.


Recently, when having drunken sex we somehow started talking about her being fucked by a mate, then it just ended up with her shouting his name out as part of our roleplay and her saying all sorts of dirty things, saying it was wrong, that she loved it, that she liked how dirty he was and how she wanted him to treat her without any respect. It was fucking intense and i loved it. I think we were both a little shocked.

We talked about it after and where fine with it. The next time we had sex we ended up doing similar but without her actually saying his name but still roleplaying she was with him.

It's all fantasy and we've txtd as her and my mate having an affair.

Like i said, not really got any questions but would like to hear what people think? I'm a little surprised as she sometimes can't stand him, sometimes get on with him, usually has bad things to say about him and isn't attracted to him. I love it though. I want him to come round for a drink so she can possibly flirt but so that afterwards we can fuck, her thinking about him.

It's always fantasy with us and i'm not about to enter a cuckold relationship but i'm looking forward to more fantasy clashing with reality.

Thanks for giving me the oppurtunity to share this.

My email is myemailaddress200909@googlemail.com if anyone wants to chat.

 

[curiousmale]

[The mate is not fantasy either. He's also a neighbour and i meet up with him regularly. I think she's flirted a little with him, commented on what a filthy fucker sexually he probably is but actually doesn't get on with him too well, rarely has anything good to say about him]

 

[Ballspanking]

Hi Curious,

The fantasy role-play that you described is not uncommon, and yes, couples often find that their fantasies exceed their actual willingness to live out that far on the edge.
Fantasies are repressed desires that probably harken back to our reptilian brain, taking no heed of social values and mores of established society, and are therefor shocking.
They expressed a repressed desire, not always a healthy one, nor a practical one.
If you wade into those waters you can easily find yourself in the deep end.
Caveat emptor.

 

[Custer Laststand]

Curiousmale,

I have been with with my woman-friend (attractive, size 10, 26 yrs old) for just over a year and we are engaged; we live together and are deeply in love. [Previously] I was with my ex-woman-friend for a few years, and never talked with her about my fantasies until the end of our relationship. It wasn't anything we shared, really.

CONGRATULATIONS for becoming engaged to such a hot-sounding and sexually-responsive woman!

But, what does "size 10" mean in terms of height and weight? (Sorry.... I'm a guy; my brain doesn't include a memorized table of dress sizes vs. physical dimensions.)

My fiance and I have discussed fantasies. I've sent her erotic fantasies I wrote with her as the 'star,' in which she is getting fucked by another man or men. She really liked it. She wanted me to write more.

It sounds like you're considerably more comfortable with your fiance, on a sexual level — and she with you — than was the case with your previous woman.

I can't believe I admitted to her that the thought of her being fucked by another man is a massive turn on, or the idea of watching. I can't believe how much she is actually turned on by this and is able to talk with me about how it doesn't affect our love/relationship [adversely].

Hey, don't worry about it. Lots of men have fantasies along those lines. It's positive that your fiance is responding well and is turned on by thoughts of this nature.... it suggests she's comfortable with sex and her own sexuality.

We roleplay where she is having an affair.

Excellent! You're turning her on....

The one thing i'd not admitted to was being turned on by the thought of her with a mate i know, who she says she isn't attracted too and who she gets along with but doesn't like him as a person, he really irritates her and she dislikes his disrespect for women. He's also less clean cut than her usual type.

Hm.... if your fiance doesn't like your friend on a personal level, that may be a bad sign with regards to future possibilities.

Recently, when having drunken sex we somehow started talking about her being fucked by a mate, then it just ended up with her shouting his name out as part of our roleplay and her saying all sorts of dirty things, saying it was wrong, that she loved it, that she liked how dirty he was and how she wanted him to treat her without any respect. It was fucking intense and i loved it. I think we were both a little shocked.

Ah-ha! ....so your friend fulfills some of your wife's secret desires and fantasies. This suggests he may, in fact, be a possibility for the future.

We talked about it after and where fine with it. The next time we had sex we ended up doing similar but without her actually saying his name but still roleplaying she was with him. It's all fantasy and we've txtd as her and my mate having an affair.

You're on the right track. Keep up your good work....

Like i said, I don't really have any questions but would like to hear what people think. I'm a little surprised as she sometimes can't stand him, sometimes gets on with him, usually has bad things to say about him, and isn't attracted to him. I love it, though. I want him to come round for a drink so she can possibly flirt but [and?] so that afterwards we can fuck, her thinking about him.

I'd say your fiance's dislike/like view of your friend is positive. It suggests she will not take him seriously as a competitor for you affections, but at some point in the future he may be able to provide your soon-to-be wife with some sexual excitement above and beyond what you will be offering her.... not because you're an incompetent lover, but because "marital sex" tends to become less than "intensely exciting" after a while.

Your view of this ["I love it!"] also sounds positive. I agree it would be a good idea to "invite your friend 'round for a drink" (as you say) so your fiance can flirt with him.... thus giving him a glimpse of his potential future, but nothing too definite, of course.

It's always fantasy with us; I'm not about to enter a cuckold relationship.

No, no.... of course not.

But, I'm looking forward to more fantasy clashing with reality.

No harm in that. More power to you, your future wife, and your joint sexual fantasies. Maybe someday you'll find yourselves acting on them, and they will greatly increase the erotic intensity of your marriage. Congratulations again for becoming engaged! It sounds like you've persuaded a good woman to marry you.

—Custer

 

[curiousmale]

Wow. Thankyou for the response.

Size 10 just means slim but not skinny, sorry i was just trying to give an idea of what she looks like.

That you think my friend fulfills her secret sexual fantasies and desires is interesting as it's the one thing that had confused me in that she doesn't seem to like him much but she really gets off on the thought of him treating her without much respect and fucking her, having an affair with him.

We did the roleplay txt thing yesterday and i suggested we roleplay in the bedroom but i wasn't home until late so she was too tired. I'm not really sure how it will develop now as i don't want her to think i'm only interested in her with him...neglected our own closeness i mean.

That she actually imagines him and it makes her cum is an amazing thing though. He's my mate and the whole situation with her and him just adds more excitement to how surprised i am.

I think i might try to hint at the idea of him coming round and see how she responds. I want to carry this fantasy on!

 

[curiousmale]

Just to add: one thing i remember is a comment she made about him ages ago. Saying 'he scares her'...she didn't mean actual fear she said it lighthearted and meant with how filthy she thought he was and some of the things she thought he'd be into. I think she's thought about how kinky he is and how dominant he'd be and this possibly turns her on.

I'm just glad we can share it.

 

[AngleBaby]

Remember, fantasy is scripted. It is perfect. It never goes wrong and no one is ever hurt. Reality is different. People do not follow scripts and you, or the ones you love, can get hurt.

 

[curiousmale]

Remember, fantasy is scripted. It is perfect. It never goes wrong and no one is ever hurt. Reality is different. People do not follow scripts and you, or the ones you love, can get hurt.

Yes, thanks.

I went to see him about something today and my GF came with me, she usually doesn't. He said he owed me a drink and she said 'what about me?' she also stood with her leg perched up. I think....that she was flirting with him. And i definitely liked it. Made me a bit nervous in reality though!

We'd txtd again that morning as him but without using his name. She used words like 'babes' which she never does with me and put kisses on the end of the txt mesg.

 

[Custer Laststand]

I went to see [my friend] about something today and my GF came with me, she usually doesn't. He said he owed me a drink and she said, 'what about me?' She also stood with her leg perched up. I think....that she was flirting with him.

Yes.... I think so. Your friend will not have missed that message either.

And I definitely liked it. Made me a bit nervous in reality though!

Very good. As your woman's husband-in-waiting, it sounds like you have the right attitude.

We'd txtd again that morning as him but without using his name. She used words like 'babes' which she never does with me and put kisses on the end of the txt mesg.

And clearly, so does your wife-to-be.

Incidentally, when is your wedding date? Are we talking about ~1 month from now, or more like ~1 year? If it's the latter and you continue encouraging your fiance to feel hotter and hotter about your friend, you may find yourself stunned one of these mornings when you wake up and discover she's decided to change horses. I mean, she's still a free woman, ya' know....

—Custer

 

[curiousmale]

About 6 months from now. I'm confident we will stay together. She's not attracted to my mate and doesn't like him. She says she's turned on by the fact that she's being fucked by someone she can't stand at times, by how wrong it is and mainly by the fact that it's with my mate and she's cheating.

We had amazing sex last night. I tied her to the bed and used her whilst she at first begged him (using his name) not to fuck her hard even though she wanted him to then was moaning and shouting his name. She purposely kissed in a way we never kiss.

We talked about it afterwards and it will be a regular thing i think. She seems really into the thought of being my friends regular fuck.

********

She even talked about flirting with a man, finding out his name and then doing the same when we get home.

 

[Custer Laststand]

Curiousmale,

[Our planned wedding date is] about 6 months from now. I'm confident we will stay together.

OK. Women tend to be attracted to men who are self-confident (more so than to men who seem hesitant and to lack confidence), so if your confidence in your fiance's attraction to you and to yourself and your abilities is genuine, that will be a plus for you — now and in the future.

She's not attracted to my mate and doesn't like him. She says she's turned on by the fact that she's being fucked by someone she can't stand at times, by how wrong it is and mainly by the fact that it's with my mate and she's cheating.

It isn't unusual for a woman to want a husband who will be a reliable partner, appears to have good future earning capability for supporting her and her children (the modern-day equivalent of being a good hunter), and will not treat her abusively or in other ways she finds offensive. A man, in other words, who will be a good life partner. Simultaneously, it is not unusual for such a woman to be sexually attracted to other men who seem "strong, macho, and aggressive" (as well as reasonably intelligent) to her — in other words, to have good genes. She would not want to be married to such men (they don't seem to her to be potentially good life partners), but she finds herself drawn to the idea of fucking them.

Your fiance's behavior toward your friend — as drawn out and encouraged by you — implies she's a good example of such a woman.

I notice, BTW, you say:

.... My fiance says she's turned on by -->the fact that<-- she's being fucked by someone she can't stand at times....

Were those her words? Did she actually say "by the *fact that* she's being fucked by...."? Or was that your interpretation of the way she's thinking?

Either way, this and your comment:

She seems really into the thought of being my friend's regular fuck.

suggest your fiance may be giving you a glimpse of your future, especially if you are a cuckold by nature (as your posts suggest you may be).

—Custer

 

[curiousmale]

Thankyou. I think it will remain fantasy for now with a bit of flirting. She's really into the roleplay though. I think the thought of me being ok with it for real would have her question my feelings for her.

It's something we'd both like but at the minute will leave as roleplay and flirting and maybe other fun.

I think i probably am a cuckold by nature but more in my deep desires than how i am.

 

[curiousmale]

Oh sorry yes...'the fact that' is just my way of saying..in that she often says she can't stand him. She's clearly attracted though.

 

[Saraha]

When a girl can't stand a guy, she can change her mind quite suddenly after she has fucked him and enjoyed the extra attention. (Cluster hinted she could change horses).

Have you roleplayed, your best friend being "Best Man" at your wedding, then secretly slipping into your wedding suite to spend the wedding night as a threesome, and then going on the honeymoon as well to "grow" the fantasy into reality.

"Two good mates sharing a hot wife".

In your role playing, why not have your fantasy toss a coin to see whether she fucks you or your mate.

 

[mimi27406]

Truth stranger than fiction?

#11 (permalink) 11-05-2009, 07:35 PM
Custer Laststand
Senior Member Join Date: Jul 2007
Posts: 1,788



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Curiousmale,


Quote:
Originally Posted by curiousmale
[Our planned wedding date is] about 6 months from now. I'm confident we will stay together.

OK. Women tend to be attracted to men who are self-confident (more so than to men who seem hesitant and to lack confidence), so if your confidence in your fiance's attraction to you and to yourself and your abilities is genuine, that will be a plus for you — now and in the future.


Quote:
Originally Posted by curiousmale
She's not attracted to my mate and doesn't like him. She says she's turned on by the fact that she's being fucked by someone she can't stand at times, by how wrong it is and mainly by the fact that it's with my mate and she's cheating.

It isn't unusual for a woman to want a husband who will be a reliable partner, appears to have good future earning capability for supporting her and her children (the modern-day equivalent of being a good hunter), and will not treat her abusively or in other ways she finds offensive. A man, in other words, who will be a good life partner. Simultaneously, it is not unusual for such a woman to be sexually attracted to other men who seem "strong, macho, and aggressive" (as well as reasonably intelligent) to her — in other words, to have good genes. She would not want to be married to such men (they don't seem to her to be potentially good life partners), but she finds herself drawn to the idea of fucking them.

Your fiance's behavior toward your friend — as drawn out and encouraged by you — implies she's a good example of such a woman.

My GF once told me the only truly free persons were white men and black women. True I suppose in its day,but today it may be any race, etc. The truth is sexual prowness does not make a relationship. My GF and I are very close, but I have a small penis and have no objection to her having other lovers(sexual partners) Communications are the key.

 

[Saraha]

Attraction is not a choice, it just happens, and if a wife is flirting, she needs to enjoy it and see where it leads to. Chemistry switches the "flirt button" on, but why would anyone want to "reel in feelings that feel so good".

All men and women (including those that pretend they don't) find themselves flirting or imagining what it would be like to have sex with other "potential Lovers". It doesn't happen every day, but it does happen sometime in our lifetimes.

Whether we act on our secret desires, depends on how scared we are of our spouse blowing a fuse. Our spouse might secretly want some space (as well) to experiment, but we won't know unless we are brave enough to share fantasies together.