Getting her Ready For Lifestyle

[waynejoyce4fun]

Hi all again, thanks for the replies to my other post asking if people if they thought my wife was ready to try a real experience. Everyone that responded pretty much felt that she was ready but that I should proceed slowly. I agree with that advice from a number of perspectives including seeing how we both feel about moving from roleplay and fantasy to reality.

One thing that I did not include in my last post and which I think might be interesting to hear people's opinions about is that for a bout six months or so, I have been e-mailing my wife under an assumed identity. I created a yahoo account. At some point I told my wife how I had met someone that really would be interested in fucking her and told her that he and I chat on line on a regular basis. Eventually I sent her an e-mail from the account. At first she was pretty sure it was me sending the e-mails but over time I have come to believe that she is very unsure who is sending her the e-mail. I have cut and pasted the last exchange. Let me know if anyone of you has any insight into waht she might be thinking and how that will effect getting her to start to spread for other men.

I wrote This:
Hi, I figured I would send you another email. It usually takes you a couple of emails before you get back to me. I bet that you are both excited and nervous when you get my messages. Excited because it turns you on and nervous because it is taboo to write to me and to think about living out your fantasies. Your husband is good with it and you should just write. What's the worst that can happen?

Send me an email its all good and will be fun. I promise that you do not know me and that no one you know knows me

She responded with this

Hi,I'm sorry that I didn't get back to you but it has been hard to get a quiet moment to sit down in front of the computer. I am always happy and excited when I hear from you but I never really know what to say to you. I always get wet when I see your name on an email and Wayne and I have a good time as a result. Wayne takes very good care of me and I love being naughty for him. He always knows what I need and how to satisfy me. For now I am content with playing the game and fueling the fire between Wayne and I. If this is enough for you than I am happy to tell you some of the naughty things that I have planned for him.
Let me know what you think.
L

What do you guys think? I am wrong to assume that she is starting to be interested in a real time encounter?

 

[OneForSure]

It looks to me like she is leaning in that direction, but is being a little cautious. I would step it up a little asking about her "I always get wet" comment. You might say something about licking her pussy when she's wet.

I think you're on your way, but it will take time. Be patient!

 

[Custer Laststand]

Waynejoyce4fun,

One thing that I did not include in my last post and which I think might be interesting to hear people's opinions about is that for a bout six months or so, I have been e-mailing my wife under an assumed identity. .... Let me know if anyone of you has any insight into what she might be thinking and how that will effect getting her to start to spread for other men.

I'm not big on deception, generally speaking. One thing you might consider is, how are you going to bring your "secret e-mail correspondence" with your wife to a close? If she gets hotter and hotter and finally wants to meet her "secret admirer," how will she respond when you admit it's actually you? Will she feel betrayed, disappointed, conned, really pissed off, and will that have a long-lasting adverse effect on your relationship with her? Alternatively, if she gets hotter and hotter then her "secret admirer" says "well, unfortunately I have other things to do" and vanishes, or simply vanishes without explanation, will that also have a devastating effect because she will feel "led on" then abandoned?

What do you guys think? I am wrong to assume that she is starting to be interested in a real time encounter?

I think you've determined your wife may be a good candidate to become your cuckoldress, in the sense that she responds (gets wet, and admits it) to other men who come on to her. That's positive. Now you need to begin thinking very carefully about how you're going to make the transition from her responding to her fake admirer (you will need to wrap this up *very* carefully, in a way that will not be destructive to her) to you arranging for her to meet one or more men who may, in reality, be potential lovers.

Toward this end, keep in mind this is the season of holiday parties. The more of those you can arrange to take your wife to, the higher the probability she will meet potential lovers. A way to help facilitate it would be for the two of you to not stick closely together at parties. Rather, drift off to talk with others, leaving your wife free to talk with other men. (You'll need to talk with her about this in advance, of course, so she doesn't feel you've boorishly abandoned her.) If you meet a man yourself who appears to be a candidate, you could conceivably facilitate the process by mentioning to him "your wife likes sex, and she's easy...." (or words to that effect). Your wife will, of course, need to have a cell phone (no doubt she does) and be prepared to give other men her number.

—Custer

 

[AngleBaby]

I agree with Custer. You are weaving a tangled web here that is going to trap you in a really bad situation.

 

[BruceCuck]

No biggie

I disagree with the concensus. It would be very, very easy for you to simply stop e-mailing. In fact it could increase her interest level if all of a sudden her little internet friend disappears. Clearly your wife is e-mailing, has revealed that she gets aroused and that her pussy gets wet.

I think that you need to start thinking about how to gently mover to the next level, and discontinuing the e-mails might just help. I woukd then tease her a bit about where her "internet lover went". Things like that. At the same you should introduce her to some the porn now available like "just screw my wife". Get this on her mind all of the time. Then when you feel she has moved a bit farther along, introduce her to a fewsites where she can see real ads from men, like swinglifestyle.com or the like.

There she can establish a new internet friend and I think things will move from there.

Don't put to much into the advice you get here, I suspect alot of the folks get ZERO pussy at home or elsewhere and just a bunch of fakes. Especially the ones who analyze every sentance of each post.

 

[Custer Laststand]

BruceCuck,

Don't put to much into the advice you get here, I suspect a lot of the folks get ZERO pussy at home or elsewhere and are just a bunch of fakes. Especially the ones who analyze every sentence of each post.

Ouch. You really know how to hurt a guy.... In self-defense, though, I'll claim my wife and I actually do still fuck once or twice a week, on average, after more than 30 years of marriage (believe it or not).

Regarding most of the folks on this forum being "fakes:" some seem obviously to be fakes, others don't seem so obvious one way or the other, some seem genuine. In one recent case, a forum member sent me several PMs asking me to comment on his thread. So I did. I said significantly more in response to his posts than I've said to anyone else on this forum since I "joined." Then, about 8 days ago when he and his wife appeared to be on the verge of attaining their goal, he vanished and has not posted since. Late yesterday, I sent him a PM asking how he and she are doing and saying I'd appreciate an update, given he initially contacted me (and his relationship with his wife seemingly improved and at least appeared to be working out successfully).

He has not responded (yet). So, is he a "fake"? Is he some guy who amused himself for a while anonymously constructing a fictional narrative, increasing his jollies by sucking me in and conning me into spending time on his fictional "case"?

I have no idea. If someone writes a thread that seems plausible and interesting, I may respond — but having it turn out to be apparently or actually "fake" is an unavoidable risk of the forum. (In one case, a writer admitted to being "fake" after being challenged rather bluntly by another forum member.) That's life in the jungle....

—Custer

 

[BruceCuck]

I did Not Mean to Offensive

Cust:

Please accept my apologies. You are always at the ready to help. This guy, I do suspect as being real (the inital poster). Question is, how does a guy who has a very sexy, clearly horny wife help her from buying into the "fiction" that it is a bad thing for her to not just desire sex from other men, but more importantly that it is clearly ok and acceptable for her to fulfill her desires if her husband is ok with it.

The thing I find interesting about the post, which you do not see regulalrly here, is a hesitant wife, who likes to roleplay, is e-mailing a potential lover (albeit fictional) and who admits that she gets wet and excitied from it. My point was only that we should be supporting this guy, with advice, and some input from experiences that we have all had in terms of our hesitant wives. It looked to me like everyone jumped on the critisim band wagon, forgetting that this guy has brought his wife along to the point where she may indeed one day spread her thighs and accept the cock of another male.

So.... lets try and help!

 

[Custer Laststand]

BruceCuck,

Cust: Please accept my apologies. You are always at the ready to help.

OK (and thanks, I appreciate your saying so).

This guy, I do suspect as being real (the inital poster).

His thread does have that sound about it (although, of course, that's always a matter of judgement).

Question is, how does a guy who has a very sexy, clearly horny wife help her from buying into the "fiction" that it is a bad thing for her to not just desire sex from other men, but more importantly that it is clearly ok and acceptable for her to fulfill her desires if her husband is ok with it.

Yes, I agree. Often (/usually) the problem is that women are heavily socialized by their mothers, their female relatives, religious leaders, teachers, and other "establishment figures" toward the desirability of being GoodGirls then, after marriage, GoodWives. It's the Judeo-Christian ethic. Hollywood helps by regularly producing "cautionary tale" movies which drill in the message that woman who express their sexuality by fucking men other than their husbands come to no good end — in fact, often in such movies they come to the worst possible end, being killed in some awful way.

The thing I find interesting about the post, which you do not see regularly here, is a hesitant wife, who likes to roleplay, is e-mailing a potential lover (albeit fictional) and admits she gets wet and excited from it.

That is interesting. She seems promising as a potential cuckoldress.

My point was only that we should be supporting this guy, with advice, and some input from experiences that we have all had in terms of our hesitant wives.

I agree. I think he has his wife on the right track, although she (apparently) does not realize it yet.

Speaking of which, it's hard to refrain from wondering if the women whose husbands plot and scheme and guide and encourage them toward becoming cuckoldresses, until finally they succeed (in some cases), realize their husbands are supported and advised by an entire online phalanx of other men and a few women sort of like the "choruses" in Shakespearean plays. One wonders if they realize how heavily outnumbered they are....

It looked to me like everyone jumped on the criticismm bandwagon, forgetting that this guy has brought his wife along to the point where she may indeed one day spread her thighs and accept the cock of another male.

I suppose Waynejoyce4fun may have interpreted it in that way, since most people are very sensitive to anything that smacks of criticism. In my case, I was attempting only to point out that, having initiated what amounts to a deceptive (if seemingly harmless) practice, it would probably be a good idea to do some planning re. how to "wrap it up" in some way that would not be counterproductive and perhaps even harmful to his marriage.

Other than that, I agree. It looks like Waynejoyce4fun is making good progress with his wife, and should certainly be encouraged to continue. His "fake e-mail admirer" approach actually seems sort of creative.

—Custer

 

[OneForSure]

waynejoyce4fun has not posted since the initial post. Is he reading the advice? I'm not sure.

I think most advice given here talks about being open in communication, and I think that is usually best. In this case, Wayne probably is going to have some difficulty once his wife realizes that he's the one e-mailing, but if he handles it well, it could turn out very well. She could realize that she's turned on by the idea of another man's cock, and if he works it right, she could follow through.

He will need to be eloquent in the discussion!

 

[waynejoyce4fun]

Dont Think The E-Mail Think Is So Big

Hi everyone and thanks for the good advice. I am not sure that the e-mail thing is really that big a deal. She does question me all the time if its me or a real person and I have been telling her "not to worry". I think the bigger issue is that even with her uncertainty about the "emailer" she still is sending messages saying ho excited she gets from hearing from him.

Last night we has crazy sex. All she wanted to do was hear about how I would set up a meeting at a bar with our friend. She was really into it and got into the role play, telling me how much she enjoyes getting cock and things of that nature.

She also told me how horny she was all day and how a number of times she had thought about the e-mails, getting fucked by our e-mail friend and how she wanted to send him a nasty note but a little scared of the reality.

I think she is now really thinking about this alot, it is part fantasy for her and part reality. I think the idea f actually doing this is driving her a bit crazy.

Guys, lets not debate the e-mails, please, some good, not far fetched, advice on how I am going to get her to experiment.

 

[Custer Laststand]

I withdraw the following comments from my post 8 in this thread.

Regarding most of the folks on this forum being "fakes:" some seem obviously to be fakes, others don't seem so obvious one way or the other, some seem genuine. In one recent case, a forum member sent me several PMs asking me to comment on his thread. So I did. I said significantly more in response to his posts than I've said to anyone else on this forum since I "joined." Then, about 8 days ago when he and his wife appeared to be on the verge of attaining their goal, he vanished and has not posted since. Late yesterday, I sent him a PM asking how he and she are doing and saying I'd appreciate an update, given he initially contacted me (and his relationship with his wife seemingly improved and at least appeared to be working out successfully).

He has not responded (yet). So, is he a "fake"? Is he some guy who amused himself for a while anonymously constructing a fictional narrative, increasing his jollies by sucking me in and conning me into spending time on his fictional "case"? I have no idea. ....

The person I was alluding to did, in fact, reply to my PM query, and has updated his thread. He said he had stopped posting because there seemed to be insufficient interest from other forum members. (The replies to his interesting and erotic update suggest he has picked up more of a following.) He went on to say his wife has, in fact, taken a lover. Hopefully he'll continue his intriguing and well-told account of her extramarital sexual ventures and his feelings and experiences as her cuckold.

—Custer

 

[Custer Laststand]

Waynejoyce4fun,

Thanks for your interesting update. It sounds like your fake erotic e-mails are, in fact, having the desired effect.

She [my wife] does question me all the time [about her erotic e-mails] if it's me or a real person....

Ah.... so she does, in fact, suspect rather strongly you are her "anonymous admirer."

....and I have been telling her "not to worry".

So.... it sounds like you have not been telling your wife, untruthfully, that you are *not* her secret admirer. That's a plus.

I think the bigger issue is that even with her uncertainty about the "e-mailer" she still is sending messages saying how excited she gets hearing from him.

Hm.... I suggest interpreting this as meaning: (i) your wife strongly suspects or knows you are her secret admirer. (People generally have characteristic writing styles and grammatical habits that tend to make their writing identifiable, so her suspicion is not surprising.) (ii) Since you persistently decline to admit you are the culprit, she is using this as a way of letting you know, without actually saying so directly, that the idea of taking a lover really turns her on. If so, your "anonymous admirer" e-mails are serving as a mechanism enabling her to tell you things she would not want to tell you directly, and perhaps could not tell you directly, because of her (entirely understandable) social and marital inhibitions.

Last night we had crazy sex. All she wanted was to hear about how I would set up a meeting at a bar with our friend. She was really into it and got into the role play, telling me how much she enjoys getting cock and things of that nature.

That's *very* cool . This suggests you are well on your way to your wife accepting, on a psychological level, that she very much wants to take lovers. In fact, she appears already to have accepted that desire within herself on a psychological level. But, given this thickening plot, you are now faced with the problem of "transitioning her" from thinking about her imaginary "anonymous e-mail admirer" to thinking about her first *real* potential lover.

She also told me how horny she was all day and how a number of times she had thought about the e-mails, getting fucked by our e-mail friend and how she wanted to send him a nasty note but was a little scared of the reality.

It's very positive that your wife is openly talking with you about her extra-marital sexual desires. This increases the pressure on you, certainly, to come up with someone for her. The heat is on.... (but obviously, you know that).

I think she is now really thinking about this a lot, it is part fantasy for her and part reality. I think the idea of actually doing this is driving her a bit crazy.

Excellent plus! You have a budding cuckoldress on your hands who can hardly wait, it sounds like.

.... please, some good, not far-fetched advice on how I am going to get her to experiment.

I suggest reading the thread initiated and continued at some length by Cuckold Bill, in this General Cuckoldry section. (He posted an update earlier today [or yesterday, depending on your time zone].) The problem he faced with persuading his wife to become his cuckoldress had some features in common with the problem you are attempting to deal with, I would say, although he did not employ fake erotic e-mails. His method for resolving it successfully — meaning, his wife has made him her cuckold — is a method I would guess you could employ successfully, if you know or can get in touch with a suitable candidate lover.

—Custer

 

[BruceCuck]

I Agree With Cust

Wayne:

There is little question but that your wife know it is you who is sending the e-mails. The good news is that she is telling you very clearly that she is turned on by the idea. That is something she cannot do except when she is accepting your cock or when she is alone with her thoughts and her private e-mail account.

The challenge now is to lead her some. I do not have the answer for you as you should realize that being turned on by the idea of a an extramarital lover is much different than actually doing it. You might be in a situation where your wife will only play out the fantasy. Although, if I am a betting man then I would be with Custer. Meaning, that if you put her in the right position, she would in all liklihood accept a lover.

I would probably stop the e-mails, maybe even admit to her that it was you. Then don't bring up this fantasy anymore. Just make love to her, plain and vanilla, I suspect that she will then start to initiate the roleplay. Once you put her in the position of having to initiate her fantasy of being fucked by other men, then you can begin to suggest thing to her like chatting on swingers sites, or visiting a swing club "just to watch".

Hopefully that helps.

 

[okdeacon]

I Think Its Cool

Wayne i think your pretty darn slick sending emails to Joyce and dont see one thing wrong with it. Plus i think (if your being totally up front with your posts) that its going to work for you. Let me predict that if Joyce tries out your buddys dick, which would mean mission accomplished. It goes well and she likes it, then you have succeded in reaching your original goal. At that time when you tell her that you are her secret emailer, she will realize that it was just a little nudge to assist her in having sex with other men for BOTH of your enjoyment. When she sees how happy she has made you she will be thrilled. Neither of you have done anything wrong to the other, just all part of the wonderful game of having a hot wife. If with your secret emails she still decides not to play even though it makes her hot. Then no harm no foul. It seems to have created a big curiosity about extra sex in her mind. As soon as she knows that you really want it she will reward you for your efforts. I think you have been very shrewd in your endeavor and i personally wish you and Joyce a very hot and loving future together. I tip my Stetson to you BOTH. okdeacon ps This is just what i think okdeacon

 

[Custer Laststand]

Waynejoyce4fun,

BruceCuck's suggestions:

.... I would probably stop the e-mails, maybe even admit to her that it was you. Then don't bring up this fantasy anymore. Just make love to her, plain and vanilla. I suspect she will then start to initiate the roleplay. Once you put her in the position of having to initiate her fantasy of being fucked by other men, then you can begin to suggest to her things like chatting on swingers sites, or visiting a swing club "just to watch".

strike me as pretty good. Since you have your wife to the point of verbally saying, out loud, the idea of extra-marital fucking turns her on strongly, you might suggest the idea of visiting a swing club — "just to visit" — so the two of you can get a feeling for what it's like. I suggest doing this *before* admitting you are her anonymous e-mail admirer. If she responds with interest to the swing club visit — or better still, actually fucks someone there (with proper protection, of course) — you might then admit that actually, her e-mail admirer is you. Since she would then be preoccupied with thinking about her swing club experience, she would be more likely (in my opinion) to have a good laugh with you about your attempted deception rather than becoming annoyed and angry. If so, you would then have a good starting point for "real life" continuation, either with the swing club or with partners selected via means the two of you could discuss.

—Custer