She's begging me...
- Thread starterpeterw8
- Start date
I just meant something along the lines of, if it happens, perhaps set a time period aside where you guys remain faithful to each other. So if she fucks him, and loves it, she will have to wait a month or so before again experimenting with another man. Though I don't think you should tell her what to do, mutually agreeing on a timeline such as the one I mentioned should help with potential jealousy issues. If she loves getting fucked by the guy, she will naturally want it again. But if you and her agree upon a time period where she doesn't go back to him again, her temptations and feelings will be held at bay.
In a sense, rather than her getting fucked and wanting it again the next day, she'll have to wait a month or so before he ravages her again. This way, she will have some time away from him, and you will have some time to contemplate your feelings, as well as have time to talk with your SO about how you want to proceed.
In a sense, rather than her getting fucked and wanting it again the next day, she'll have to wait a month or so before he ravages her again. This way, she will have some time away from him, and you will have some time to contemplate your feelings, as well as have time to talk with your SO about how you want to proceed.
Mac -- thanks for the guidance. Let me provide a few more details. She contacted him at my request. This is an idea we've been exploring for years. The fantasy started with strangers, then moved on to people she knew, particularly men she dated (the trust made it more realistic for her, which of course turned me on).
She looked up a couple different guys on facebook, and this guy was still single. And as I said, their relationship was never serious. So he was the natural choice.
Our latest version of this fantasy would be a 3-way, but mostly him and her playing while I watched.
She looked up a couple different guys on facebook, and this guy was still single. And as I said, their relationship was never serious. So he was the natural choice.
Our latest version of this fantasy would be a 3-way, but mostly him and her playing while I watched.
I would say, because he wasn't a long term boyfriend this might be ok. If he was a long term boyfriend from the past that would certainly be a poor idea. Of course any time a guy from the past comes around it can be tricky.
On the other hand she has already contacted him and it sounds like this guy could be the real thing. So maybe you want to just take the plunge.
Because you and your wife have been married a while I should hope you two have built a good level of trust and communication and you should just talk to her about your thoughts and set some ground rules. Maybe start with a three way and then if things go good you can let them have a few dates. If things go good after two or three dates (or threeways) you get the full right to pull the plug or let things continue.
Being that this guy is still single, at whatever age you and your wife are. Maybe he was a good lay back in the day, but obviously isn't the realationship type of guy. So I would assume that you have little to worry about on the emotional end of things.
On the other hand she has already contacted him and it sounds like this guy could be the real thing. So maybe you want to just take the plunge.
Because you and your wife have been married a while I should hope you two have built a good level of trust and communication and you should just talk to her about your thoughts and set some ground rules. Maybe start with a three way and then if things go good you can let them have a few dates. If things go good after two or three dates (or threeways) you get the full right to pull the plug or let things continue.
Being that this guy is still single, at whatever age you and your wife are. Maybe he was a good lay back in the day, but obviously isn't the realationship type of guy. So I would assume that you have little to worry about on the emotional end of things.
peterw8 said:
This is exactly how my wife and I started..... Fantasy for a long time; she was afraid to meet strangers, so I encouraged her to meet her ex boyfriend. One difference: Her ex is married with kids and I don't worry as much about losing my wife to him. He is just looking for sex.....
I agree with previous suggestions about setting limits and rules before anything starts. If everyone isn't happy and secure, the relationship will be in trouble. Good luck!
Vladdy makes a good point (about this guy still being single and may not be the "relationship" type), but as most have said, dealing with exes is a very complicated thing. Sure, their previous relationship may NOT have been sexual, but there WERE some kind of feelings there. You even said that you believe she'll become attached to him if they hook-up.
I believe that if you're going to take the plunge, you do it with a person that neither of you have previous ties to in any way.
Proceed with caution.
I believe that if you're going to take the plunge, you do it with a person that neither of you have previous ties to in any way.
Proceed with caution.
I had the same upset at the beginning when I introduced a handsome guy to my wife. I was worried that my wife would be attracted by him and leave me. So I told the guy at the very beginning that he could fuck my wife but they should not love each other. However, with time went by, I feel that if there is chemistry between them things would be more intresting and exciting. I guess it is a symbol for me to become submissive.
I cannot agree that setup a pre-condition like "time period" will help you to secure your relationship. Emational is illogical. It can't be controlled by reasonable thinking or prescription. Just believe, whatever it happens, it's your fate.
I cannot agree that setup a pre-condition like "time period" will help you to secure your relationship. Emational is illogical. It can't be controlled by reasonable thinking or prescription. Just believe, whatever it happens, it's your fate.
My thoughts on this is, if you have been together any length of time and are secure in your relationship. you talk openly and honestly about everything, no one in the world is going to change this, change comes about if your not honest with each other or really are having issues already and hope this somehow makes your relationship better, it works well if your a real unit together, doesn't work if your not. Not to expect somekind of emotional outcome from all involved is foolish, of course their will be, but talking, understanding removes the fears of this. I am one that believes you can love more than one person at a time, you may love them in different ways and for different reasons but it is possible and probable in our lifestyle.
Trying to put limits on either of you is pure foolishness and a divorce waiting to happen, thats like here have this piece of candy you love, but just take a bite and no more until I say you can... Not going to happen, all that will happen is resentment and eventually she will eat it with or witout you saying ok... No restrictions and understanding her new found lust and accepting it, will only make your relationship stronger JMHO
Trying to put limits on either of you is pure foolishness and a divorce waiting to happen, thats like here have this piece of candy you love, but just take a bite and no more until I say you can... Not going to happen, all that will happen is resentment and eventually she will eat it with or witout you saying ok... No restrictions and understanding her new found lust and accepting it, will only make your relationship stronger JMHO
Encourage your wife to go with her instincts, and see what happens. It takes away the spontaneity and fun if it is a "paint by numbers" set of rules. If she is out with a guy and it is 1am, she might as well wait until after breakfast before trying to drive home.
It can be like children in a candy shop for a start, but when your wife has an extra 100 fucks under her belt, the novelty wears off alittle, then she is no longer feeling deprived by the strict rules of your marriage.
The more you and your wife talk about sex and what you both need the better, but give her lots of private time with her boyfriends.
It can be like children in a candy shop for a start, but when your wife has an extra 100 fucks under her belt, the novelty wears off alittle, then she is no longer feeling deprived by the strict rules of your marriage.
The more you and your wife talk about sex and what you both need the better, but give her lots of private time with her boyfriends.
